Survival mode

I'm sure I will find more interesting things to write about at some point, but for now all I've got is my daily routine. As the Mom of two young kids I'm finding that there is little time for non-essential things. I feel rushed to get the kids dressed, fed, and hussled off to daycare so I can get to work. I don't know how it is possible to wake up at 6 am (or earlier if the infant sees fit) and still struggle to get to work by 8:30 am, but it is. I don't even blow dry my hair anymore because it takes too long. If I'm at a client site I make an extra effort to put on make-up, but if it is an office day I get by with very little. This was unheard of to me pre-kids, it was actually unheard of pre-baby #2, but my standards have lowered.

After work there is another rush to get home before the kids (husband picks them up), so I can squeeze in a 30-40 minute treadmill run without too many interruptions (I used to run outdoors in all kinds of weather, but now the treadmill is my friend). Then there is preparing/eating dinner while still wearing sweat soaked running clothes, and cleaning up dinner/kids after eating. I finally shower at some point, and then need to begin the kids bedtime rituals. On a good night, both kids are in bed by 8:30 PM, and I get a few moments to relax on the couch or in front of the computer before bed. I know the infant will wake up during the night, so I should go to bed at 9 PM, but it just never happens. The next day will begin all too soon, and the routine will repeat with minor variations.

One day the toddler might be defiant, and the infant pliable, the next day the roles might reverse, but for the most part my life exists in survival mode--doing what I need to do, but not much else. In many ways the treadmill is a good analogy for my life at this phase, I keep running but I never seem to get anywhere. I'm sure tomorrow will bring more of the same, but the kids will do something cute and it won't matter all that much how hurried and tired I am. Survival mode is more than just surviving, but sometimes in survival mode you are thankful for a 6-hour stretch of uninterupted sleep (and a bunch of coffee) to make survival just a little easier the next day.

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