Overheard

Sometimes we accidentally on purpose don’t turn on the baby monitor, but other times we really do just forget to turn it on. One night last week such a thing occurred, and when we realized our mistake we heard the following exchange (the kids were supposed to be sleeping and they do not share a room):

The Boy: *The Girl’s name* *The Girl’s name* look at this picture
The Girl: A baby
The Boy: It’s me!
The Boy: That is me as a baby, look Mommy is holding me
The Girl: My mommy!
The Boy: No, she is both of our Mommy
The Boy: This is Arizona Grandma holding me when I was a baby, and Arizona Grandpa
The Girl: Where’s me?
The Boy: Look, I’m growing up in this picture
The Girl: but where’s me?
The Boy: Daddy is holding me when I was a baby
The Girl: Where’s me?

DH and I have a little discussion and decide that The Boy is showing The Girl the photo album my Mom (Arizona Grandma) gave The Boy for Christmas a few years back. It is filled with pictures of The Boy as a baby, and as a one-year-old, pictures with his Arizona Grandparents and pictures of DH and me. We decide we need to break up this little interlude before The Girl realizes that we have very few pictures of her in albums.

I arrive upstairs and as The Boy hears me walking up the stairs he quickly shuffles back into his own room. I was just helping *The Girl’s name*, he tells me. Helping her do what, I question? I was just helping her. Okay. The scene in The Girl’s room is comical; all of the toys from her storage bins are either in her crib or on the floor just outside of her crib. Presumably The Boy had been helping her gather all of her toys as she directed him from inside her crib. We all giggle a little, clean up, and bed time is enforced. While we certainly don’t want to encourage these little events, I still get a smile on my face when I think about it. Sometimes I could just eat them up. They are so sweet when they aren’t whining or torturing each other.

Remodling isn't all bad

We've been without a kitchen for 8 weeks now. You would think we would be going absolutely crazy, but I've got to say that we aren't. In fact, at the family reunion we attended yesterday I found myself telling other people how it was actually kind of nice not to have to do dishes. *gasp* Not only are we using all paper plates, but we have paper bowls, paper/plastic cups, and plastic utensils. Oh sure we have a wet bar sink to wash things in, and sometimes we have to use an avoidable reusable dish, but we can't even be bothered to wash silverware. We have taken this lack of kitchen thing to the extreme. I did breakdown and buy the "Earthware" paper plates the other day because the waste we are producing was starting to get to me a bit though.

Another unintended benefit is that you can't hear the kids screaming on the second floor if you hunker down in the office in the basement. Oh, of course we do have a baby monitor for such occasions, but what fun is it to hide in the office if you can hear the kids screaming? This way I can pretend that they are sleeping. Not that I am doing that right now or anything...

The bad part of this plan is that The Boy can get out of bed on his own and will wander around the house looking for me. He has also figured out that if he goes into The Girl's room and talks "to her" we can hear him on the monitor (assuming it is on). This of course makes The Girl scream, but at least we can't hear it.

Soon enough we will be back to living on the main floor, where it is almost impossible to avoid the screaming sounds that filter down from the second floor. At least we had a short reprieve.

Not twice the effort

I had a fabulous run yesterday, one of those runs where you feel like you could run forever, but your body still thanks you when you stop after 6.5 miles. I wasn’t running fast by any means, but I did finally venture back to the scene of the great snake sighting. Running by that creek always puts me in a good mood. I was reminded again just how lucky I am to have such a scenic trail so close to home. Mostly though I just let my mind wander. I started thinking that I should really sign up for a race because it has been many months since I last raced. Perhaps a summer half marathon is in order to spur me to run longer than a seven mile long run each week (or 6.5). I should check the race calendar to see what my options are.

As I was contemplating the idea of a half marathon, I was reminded of a conversation I had after completing one of my early half marathons. I was relating that a half marathon was a huge effort, and I didn’t see how it would be possible to run twice as long in order to complete a full marathon. A half marathon was taxing enough, I just didn’t see how I could expend even more effort to run a full. I honestly can’t remember who it was that responded that “A marathon isn’t twice the effort; it is the same effort, longer.” I remember thinking this couldn’t possibly be true, but after running a few marathons I’d wager that she was right. Of course getting to the point of being able to expend the same effort for twice as long isn’t trivial. It takes many weeks, and many long runs in order to build your endurance to that point.

I was trying to decide if the whole not twice the effort, just the same effort longer thing works for other areas of my life. Does it work for having more than one kid? No, having two kids is definitely more effort than having just one. Or is it? Yes, most definitely it is. Although, a case could be made that it is just the same effort longer. I mean yes there are two kids to get dressed in the morning, two kids to help put shoes on, two kids to get strapped into their car seats, and two kids to hug and kiss goodbye when they are dropped off at daycare. That all boils down to the same effort spread over more time though. Helping The Boy get dressed isn’t all that different from helping The Girl get dressed, one involves a diaper change and the other involves some prodding to use the toilet. Still, it isn’t all bad, there are now two kids who look at me like I am their world, two kids who say “I love you Mommy,” or in the case of The Girl “My love you Mommy.” Two kids who I get to watch transform before my eyes as they learn and grow each and every day.

I don’t plan on running any marathons in the near future, but it is clear that I will be participating in plenty of endurance sporting for the next several years. Yes, I will keep running, but the biggest test of my endurance to date seems to be this thing called parenting. There is no option of taking the DNF here either. In a marathon I can quit at any point, but with kids we have to just keep on running no matter how tired we are. Whether it is lying on the floor until The Girl goes to sleep, or handling the tough life and death questions with some sort of clarity, there is always a new challenge. I expect that while the physically challenging aspects of parenting (sleep deprivation, having to carry children around, etc.) will diminish as the kids age, the new mental challenges will be just as great. I swear, I never thought of any of this when we first decided to have kids.

Divide and Conquer

Monday evenings can be somewhat tricky in our house. The Boy is generally a little more tired than normal after playing all day with his daycare buddies, and he often takes out his frustrations on the rest of us. After about the 10th whine of “but she is taking it,” or “but she isn’t playing it right” directed to us about The Girl we decided it was time to intervene. I offered to bring one of The Boy’s basement toys up to his bedroom while we kept The Girl downstairs with us. He excitedly agreed to this arrangement, went upstairs, and played happily until nearly bed time. DH later commented that this must be known as the “divide and conquer” parenting technique. It is definitely a technique we will keep up our sleeves to use again. It is amazing how much of parenting is just done by trial and error, and how strongly we cling onto the things that actually work.

Easier?

Written Monday night...
Conversation with DH before bed last night:
DH: Weekends are harder than weekdays
Me: What?
DH: The kids are exhausting
Me: The kids are exhausting every day, but yes on the weekend we have to deal with them all day long.
DH: Good night.

So the conversation got me thinking, are weekends really harder than weekdays? The test came this morning, DH left for work just as I hopped into the shower this morning, the goblins were still asleep...lying in wait. Thankfully Infant woke up first, shot me a huge smile as she stood up in the crib, and made those nice little grunting noises to tell me she was happy to see me. She also ate without biting me (Biting), so the morning was starting off well. It was just too bad that Toddler woke up on the wrong side of my bed (of course he was sleeping horizontally across our bed with his feet buried in my chest, so I don't think side of the bed really applies). Toddler seemed content after just a few minutes of cuddling, we headed for the kitchen to get his daily Pop Tart, I poured him some milk, then all hell broke loose. I am not sure if the offense was that I filled the wrong sippy cup, that I filled the cup at all, or that it was filled with milk instead of juice. Toddler became Toddzilla when he saw the milk filled sippy cup on the kitchen counter, and proceeded to throw a monster tantrum, that he never really recovered from.

I somehow managed to force some clothes on Toddler despite his protests, in the process however Infant found said sippy cup and had spilled milk all over herself and the living room floor. I cleaned up the mess, then tried to console Toddler who was now asking for Madagascar. I had to explain to Toddler that we had naively ordered Madagascar as a Pay Per View movie, and it was no longer available to us without paying another $3.95...blank stare from Toddler. He continues to ask for Madagascar, and I find Seasame street on Digital Cable, he throws a bigger fit "I don't want that, I want Lion, and Zebra, and Piggy Bank." Didn't we just go over that buddy???, and what Piggy Bank are you talking about (I guess that he is confusing Toy Story with Madagascar now, but that is just too deep for a Monday morning). We find Winnie the Pooh on Disney Channel West, and Toddler is content enough to let me finish getting my stash of stuff out to the car (laptop, pump, Infant's milk for daycare, etc.), then Disney Channel has the gaul to show a commercial, Toddler starts accusing me of changing the channel without his knowledge or approval. I feel like screaming Calgon take me away!, but I know it would just be lost on my audience.

Somehow we all make it into the car, get to daycare, and even get into the front door of daycare. I must have made some horrible mistake at that point though, because Toddler refused to go downstairs (split entry house, daycare in the lower level). I get Infant situated in daycare, and come back for Toddler. I sit on the couch with Toddler for maybe 5 mintues trying to convince him that he will indeed have fun at daycare...

I make it to work, sip some coffee, and relax for just a moment before starting everything I need to get done for the day. I feel like I've already put in a full day, but in a lot of ways a workday is the worst of the kids. They do not like transitions, and workdays are days full of transitions for them. On weekends they never let up, but we get lots of quiet down time at home. I don't necessarily think that weekends are any harder than workdays, just different.

Must get some sleep, Tuesday will start all too soon.

Sibling play

Infant and Toddler are sometimes just too cute for words. Watching them really start to play with each other tonight was absolutely amazing. Toddler did everything possible to get Infant to notice his every move. Infant followed Toddler around like a little puppy. Both of them giggled the entire time. It was a shame when they noticed that their father and I were watching them, because then they turned to us for entertainment. Sometimes I try to analyze how different Infant's first two years will be from Toddler's first two years. Toddler spent long stretches of time playing alone. He sat content in one place, playing with and chewing on various toys. Infant, is much more mobile than Toddler was at the same age. I wonder if she is mobile because she longs to get in on the action with her brother, or if she would have been the same if she were an only child. I suppose this gets into the whole Nature vs. Nurture debate, and I am far too tired to really delve into it further. I'm thrilled that my kids like each other at this stage, and I hope it lasts for a long time to come. I'm sure I am naive to believe that my kids won't fight the way my brother and I fought, but I hope it doesn't happen for many years to come.