Just Treadmilling Around

An Early Christmas Present

2008-12-21T21:08:00.004-06:00

The Boy and The Girl will not stop singing this silly song from a cell phone commercial. It is driving me bonkers, but tonight I decided to record them doing it so I could share it with family and friends.

Ambivalence

2008-12-18T20:38:00.003-06:00

I am inching closer to the magic age of 35 with every passing day. I remember telling T at one point that we would certainly be absolutely and completely done having kids by the time I turned 35. I didn't want to be pregnant at an "advanced maternal age." I was 29 when The Boy was born, and 31 when The Girl was born. At 33 there was no way I was ready for another child, and even at 34 it still seems crazy at times. However, as The Girl gets older I find myself wondering if we are done, or if we are just taking a longer break between kids. T and I have had this conversation countless times over the course of the past few years. I know he feels very happy with our family the way it is, he fears the hormonal mess I was during the first few months after The Girl was born - and rightfully so...at least until the Vitamin Z kicked in. He also worries about our kids not being close enough in age, he worries about the third and final child being left out of things since The Boy and The Girl are thick as thieves. He has also started telling me that he is too old to start over again. *sigh* He always ends the conversation saying that he will support whatever decision I make, that if I want to have another child he is willing to try, but that he is also very happy to be done and will make the appointment for the vasectomy as soon as I give him the word.

Why is this so hard? So many of my friends tell me that they just knew they were done with whatever number of kids they have, why don't I just know? Why can't I just feel done? Frankly even more frustrating for me is the fact that I am so ambivalent about it. One day I am 100% convinced that we will have another, and then the next as I'm struggling to buckle The Girl into her carseat in the freezing MN temps I swear that I can't wait until both kids can buckle themselves into their seats and that I'm crazy to start again with another baby. Or, I take both kids to a store and listen to them fight, and I *know* that we are done with two kids. Instead of making a real decision I vacillate between the two extremes almost daily. I'm tired of it. I want to come to a decision and make peace with it.

How did you know you were done?

Breaking all popularity records

2008-10-27T19:46:00.005-06:00

45 comments to my Super Why instruction post breaks all previous records of replies to posts for me. I was curious as to why I was getting so many hits, so I googled "Super Why costume" and found that my post from last year was the number one hit. Craziness! I'm glad that some of you found it helpful. In case some of you aren't getting emails from the Super Why Club Newsletter, this PDF file might be fun for you and your little ones. In case you are still looking for the graphic, please go to Baby Blog Addict for a clean crisp and easily accessible logo. Our Halloween madness begins tomorrow with the annual daycare Halloween party. I'm a little ashamed to admit that The Boy won't even watch Super Why anymore, but his little sister does still like it when she can be dragged away from The Backyardigans. Our Super Why costume will be sitting on a shelf this year, but maybe The Girl will want to wear it next year? She is planning on dressing as Buzz Lightyear this year, and The Boy will be Curious George.

The Halloween tricks began early for us, when the kids decided to decorate our door with sidewalk chalk. While it wasn't a fully santioned activity, it was too cute not to photograph.

Happy Halloween!

Super Why the Costume Part II

2008-10-15T20:18:00.006-05:00

I thought this Halloween would be easier for parents of Super Why obsessed kids. However, from the occasional comments to this post from last year, and the flood of emails I get (in my treadmillista account that I basically never check) in response to the Super Why costume I guess I am wrong. I decided to take the time to detail out The Boy's Super Why costume from last year. Hopefully this can help someone else, who is looking for ways to make a Super Why costume for their Super Whyatt loving children.

Please note that I can't find the mask. The costume was in a pile of costumes in the basement play room, and as you know children don't always leave things in neat little piles. I suspect the mask is hiding somewhere in our 2-story plus finished basement house...I just don't know where.

The Shirt: this was made with green t-shirt material by my fabulous MIL. I found the logo on a coloring page printable from the PBS kids website, and then printed it on iron-on ink jet paper (you can buy the iron on ink jet paper at a variety of places including Target) and T ironed it onto the shirt. Baby Blog Addict posted a fabulous clean jpeg image that you can use for this purpose, so check it out - I was emailing it, but I'm burnt out!

The shirt with the pants: The pants were made with the same t-shirt material. My MIL is pretty resourceful and didn't need a pattern to make either the shirt or the pants. This is great because I don't even know how to turn on our sewing machine (it is really T's not mine).

The back of the shirt has two small velcro strips sewn onto it, for easy attachment of the cape:

The shirt with the cape attached: The cape was re-used from a very old costume from T's childhood when he was Batman. It feels like a nylon blend of some sort.

The little shorts: These were also re-used from that same very old Batman costume. Same material as the cape...

The under shirt: The Boy had this already in his closet. It is a size 4 Lands End plain blue long-sleeved t-shirt.

The total package (minus the mask):

The mask - If I remember correctly we used thin foam board to get the basic shape, and then my MIL wrapped the green t-shirt material around it somehow. She used velcro strips at the end of strings of the t-shirt material so it could be secured around The Boy's head.

If you have further questions I will try to funnel them to my mother in law! I hope this helps someone.

Note: I updated the link to the Super Why logo, this new link should work. I apologize for not being responsive to questions/emails, but my current job has me swamped and just unable to devote time to a blog anymore. Good luck with your costume making!

A tough return

2008-10-10T21:21:00.004-05:00

It isn't news to you that I am not blogging much these days, or well this year. When you start every post in somewhat of a similar vein, it likely unnecessary though isn't it? I'm back primarily because I'm dealing with something that is happening to a friend, and wanted to talk about it here.

However, first of all I wanted to say that some things have changed in my life in the past few months. I got a new job. A new job that doesn't require any travel. My commute shortened, my work flexibility increased, and I moved completely out of the realm of engineering. It is too soon to tell if this is a good thing, but frankly for the sake of my family this is a very good change. I no longer have to live with the fear that I will have to travel next week or the week after, and dread those long trips away from my kids. It is all about them, and spending time with them.

So the thing I'm struggling with is that one of the strong and fabulous women with whom I've been in a buddy group with since The Boy was teeny tiny...she is going to miss out on all of the rest of the years with her kids. It is so completely unfair to lose a friend, but a friend with a 5 year old and a 2 year old is just too much. Every time I look at my kids and make plans for next week I think of her, and her battle to make it through just one more day.

Hug your kids, hold them tight. Cherish every moment you have with them.

A boy and his toads

2008-07-05T06:44:00.005-05:00

The Boy is currently in the midst of, what I have been calling, a critter obsession. Here he shows off the toads he found a little more than a week ago (all were released before bedtime that night in case you were wondering).

I tried to imbed the link in this post, but it doesn't seem to be working...

An update

2008-06-18T19:21:00.004-05:00

I don't think I can make any promises about a return to regular blogging. After a while the novelty wore off, and I lost the drive to post things. I thought I would post a short update for you in any case.

Running
Running is going pretty well for me lately. I made the decision a few months back to take a tiny step back from running so that I could incorporate more cross training. I've been doing The Firm DVDs on my days off from running, and I really enjoy them. Well that isn't entirely true, I mean the DVDSs aren't fun exactly, but I enjoy the results I've seen from doing them consistently. I'm now running 4 days per week, hovering between 20-25 miles per week, but I'm also doing The Firm 2-3 times per week. My leg strength has dramatically increased. I can now run up big hills on my routes without having the slightest (well there might be some) complaint from my legs. It feels great. My arms have muscle tone again. I've been wearing sleeveless shirts on occasion, and have had a few people compliment my arms. Honestly I thought that I had to give up on being buff after I had the kids, but it turns out I didn't.

Weight loss
I watched the Paul McKenna "I Can Make You Thin" series that was on TLC this spring, and it made a huge impact on me. I had gained some weight over the winter, and was feeling pretty depressed about it, and the show started at exactly the right moment to give me an extra kick. For once in my life I've been losing weight without feeling like I'm on a freakish diet that I will instantly stop as soon as I reach my goal weight. Weight Watchers taught me how to control my portions, and how to stay within a POINTS range, but it never taught me how to listen to the cues my own body was sending me to get me to eat and stop eating. I've lost 13 pounds since that first show aired in late March. I didn't use much of his advice apart from the 4 golden rules he drilled in. All of those thoughts I had that perhaps my body just didn't want to get back to its pre The Boy weight, were just excuses. I'm 2-3 pounds from that weight now, and it feels fantastic to have done it without counting a single point or calorie. I eat when I'm hungry, and I stop when I'm full, and I eat what I feel like eating not what I think I should. It sounds so simple, and like it can't possibly work, but it really does.

The Boy
He turns 5 on Saturday. I can't believe how fast this time has gone. In some ways it feels like he has been in my life forever, but in others it feels like he was just born and I was cradling him in my arms struggling to make breastfeeding work. He has a new love of nature, and is obsessed with catching bugs/frogs/toads, or whatever else he can think of at the moment. He is also in love with his bike. He rides as often as he can, and for as long as we will let him. He took to the bike almost immediately, and while he insists that the training wheels will stay on forever we think he is almost ready to ditch them now (he got the bike last month!). He continues to question everything he sees and everything we say, but I guess it shows he has a good thirst for knowledge. We plan to send him to full day Kindergarten in the fall. We worry a bit that he will be the youngest in his class, but in all regards he does seem ready. All we can do is go with what we know now, and be thankful that the neighbor kid who is a few days younger than him is also starting full day Kindergarten in the fall.

The Girl
She turned 3 last month. She is nothing if not full of life. She recovered well from her stitches, although we do think there will be a lasting scar from the experience. She is not a shrinking violet, she lets the entire world know when she is unhappy about something. Just the other day T was driving her home from daycare and she threw up while sitting in her carseat. T tried to comfort her as he rushed her home by saying "oh baby, I'm so sorry." She stopped mid-puke to say "I am NOT a gurgle gurgle Baby!" She has no qualms about letting you know when you are wrong! There have been many days when I just give up on getting her dressed in the morning, and just send her to daycare in her jammies...it is just easier than fighting with her. I'd add that she'll likely be a handful in her teen years, but who really knows. She is a handful now, but she definitely makes our lives interesting. She has been spreading rumors at daycare that we have a new baby at home, but that it is teeny tiny. News to us! Perhaps she knows something that we don't (though really she doesn't!). She is actually sitting on the computer desk as I type this right now, she is asking me to read the invitation for her brother's birthday party that was sitting on the desk. Does this say Happy J Birthday? She is so cute.

The House/Remodel
We finally got new furniture for the house this spring. It feels nice to have real grown up furniture in our new space. Of course the remodel never really ends. We have plans to tackle the worst of the landscaping issues this summer...maybe if we make effort.

What else?
I'm not sure what else I should update my blog readers about. If you have any questions for me post them in the comments and I'll try to respond!

A Stitch in Time

2008-04-01T14:37:00.002-06:00

Sunday began like any other Sunday would. The kids watched some television, I lingered in front of the computer with my coffee, and T slept in. The laundry got done, my run got accomplished, the bathrooms got cleaned, and we even managed to make it to the park to enjoy our spring-like temps. The kids got to try flying kites for the first time ever, and aside from the fact that The Boy’s kite wouldn’t get airborne we had a good time.

The afternoon and evening were less enjoyable. The Girl wouldn’t nap, which made me cranky, and The Boy was busy pouting about everything. We did manage a fairly good dinner though, which I quickly followed with a trip to the grocery store to get milk. The rest of the evening was not so fun. The Boy pushed The Girl, which caused her to trip over a shoe and land with her face on the corner of a bench. ER visit number one resulted in stitches for The Girl. Her first ever stitches, and my first ever viewing of stitching of skin took place.

We got home, and I put the kids to bed. After finishing the bedtime ritual I found that the dinner dishes were still sitting on the table. I began cleaning things in a huff, T pitched in, and we were nearly finished when I managed to slice my right index finger with the steak knife I was washing. ER visit number two resulted in 5 stitches on my finger, a tetanus shot in my left arm, and not getting home until 12:30 AM on my birthday. Thankfully T’s parents came to stay with the kids for ER visit number two, because the 3 hour wait would not have been enjoyable with two cranky children in tow.

I can think of better ways to start off a birthday, but at least it is over. I will spare you the picture of my finger.

Happy Easter

2008-03-24T13:03:00.004-06:00

Ahhh Easter, spring time, birds chirping, bulbs popping up, snow melting, er falling

At least we could make snowmen

The winter that would not end

At least we could pretend it was spring last week

A pet

2008-03-20T13:05:00.001-06:00

I have made short sighted statements in the past regarding our lack of pets. I hope to keep us pet-free because I just don’t want to deal with the maintenance of a pet right now. Two children under the age of five is enough work for me thankyouverymuch. I’m still not completely over the loss of our dog several years ago, and honestly don’t want to start another relationship with an animal that could end badly. The Boy, on the other hand, is full of life and love for nature. He comes home from daycare or preschool almost every day with a new idea for a proposed pet. A few weeks ago he asked me if he could have snails. I said NO before he had time to finish his sentence. He sobbed uncontrollably for a long time.

A few days after the snail question he came home from daycare with a glass jar filled with a few ants. Um, okay. We told him that the ants needed to live outside so they got some fresh air. He agreed. The ants were dead by morning. A few days later he came home with even more ants, and insisted that they had to live inside our house or they would die outside in the cold. We relented, how could we punish his ants to death knowingly? The ants were dead by the middle of the next day. The Boy is undeterred by the death of his much loved pets; he keeps trying to catch more bugs.

In a lack of reasoning I offered to help him get tadpoles from the pond when it gets warm enough. He received a bug/frog habitat for his birthday last year, and I told him it could serve as a home for his tadpoles. He was very excited about the prospect of having many frogs as pets; until I told him that we would have to let the frogs go when they emerged (I’m not really counting on frogs emerging given how much The Boy likes to alter the not-so-natural environment they would live in). He was still happy about the idea that he would get a pet though so I thought we had dodged a bullet.

Apparently I was wrong about dodging the bullet though. Upon my arrival to pick the kids up from daycare yesterday I was TOLD that The Boy (by The Boy) was bringing home FIVE snails. He held them up, in their sad little Dixie cup filled with water, so I could see them. I said NO. He threw a fit of epic proportions. He hit me, he pushed me, he tried to kick me. I put him in a time-out, and hoped that he would calm down. He did not. I ended up getting The Girl ready to go home and then physically forcing The Boy to leave with us. He sobbed uncontrollably until we got close to home. I managed to make him laugh, apparently all was forgiven.

I have a feeling that this story isn’t really over. Any guesses as to what the next pet will be?

A quick check in

2008-03-12T19:53:00.003-06:00

I have bloggers block. I have nothing interesting to write about so I continue my long streak of not blogging at all. Even worse is that I've completely stopped reading other blogs. It is shocking, but I won't even open my Google Reader because I am overwhelmed by the number of unread posts that will appear. I plan to post more regularly again, but I think it will take me a few tries to get back up on the horse.

A token January post

2008-01-31T21:50:00.000-06:00

There are no excuses, I've just been absent. Work is busier than ever before blah blah blah blah blah. I will spare you the details. My Mom informed me that there was no new content here, which I knew but it served as a reminder that I should try to revive this poor neglected blog. I have thoughts of just completely giving up on it. I get a fair amount of hits when I am active here, but I'm not sure that is enough for me to keep writing here. I had lots of ideas for posts in the beginning, but now nothing comes to me, or rather things come to me but I find that I just don't expend the energy to post them.

I actually had grand ideas of starting a second blog devoted to the working/traveling Mom, but I seriously don't know how I would manage another blog since I can't manage this one. I'm on night number four of this business trip. It has been long. I miss the kids. I miss T. I miss my own home and my routines. The positive thought for tonight is that I get to go home tomorrow. I'll get to see the kids in person rather than through the grainy webcam Skype call. That thought gets me through, makes me smile, and makes me push through the trip. I think I need to travel again this month, but it will be a much shorter trip. There is a light at the end of the tunnel though. I think I will find a way off of the traveling road eventually, but I'm not there yet.

Finding the joy again

2007-12-19T16:05:00.000-06:00

This is the first year in many when I haven’t felt completely overwhelmed by the idea of Christmas looming in the distance. There have always been elaborate check lists of things that need to be done, gifts that need to be purchased, events that need to be attended, etc. While we still have all of that, for some odd reason this year I am not stressed out about it. I’m not even really done with my Christmas shopping, but yet I haven’t put much energy into what is left outstanding on my lists.

I’m not sure what I did differently this year. I have started listening to Christmas music in the car, and I have been thoroughly enjoying watching the kids react to everything that is Christmas. I’m looking forward to my Mom arriving this Friday and even more so to having her around Christmas morning to watch the kids react to the completely overblown morning of opening presents and playing with new toys. I’m no longer looking at all things Christmas as an obligation, but rather as an exciting opportunity to witness pure joy from my kids.

I am not trying to have a perfect Christmas, but rather I am trying to enjoy Christmas. I will not be spending the entire Christmas day cooking in the kitchen for the house full of company we are expecting, but there will be good food to eat. We will not have a formal sit down dinner, because that is not what we enjoy. In fact the idea of a formal sit down dinner gives me chills and raises my heart rate, but the idea of people grabbing their own food and eating buffet style makes me happy. I think life is too short to suffer through a formal meal simply because it is what you think you should do. I also think it is a shame to miss all of the joy and excitement of Christmas because you need to cook a mountain of side dishes.

It is really nice to be anticipating Christmas rather than begrudging it. I hope this gift I’ve given myself lasts for the rest of my life. It is nice to be able to say that I like Christmas and really mean it.

It's a Jib Jab Life

2007-12-15T09:03:00.000-06:00

Yes, I am wasting a bunch of time this fine morning.

Don't send a lame Holiday eCard. Try JibJab Sendables!

Snowball fight

2007-12-15T08:48:00.000-06:00

I didn't spend too much time making the heads look right for this movie, but it is still pretty funny. Enjoy!

Don't send a lame Holiday eCard. Try JibJab Sendables!

The card

2007-12-13T21:36:00.000-06:00

I decided to make Christmas cards after all. I spent the bulk of yesterday evening working on the outside photo portion, and then spent the bulk of tonight working on the inside. I think it turned out pretty well. T thinks that the inside verse is cheesy, but well he didn't make them so I'm discounting his opinion *pbbt*.

So I give you the oustide of the card (click to get a larger image):

and the inside of the card:

To card or not to card

2007-12-12T14:34:00.000-06:00

T and I have been married for 10 years. We have sent out Christmas cards each and every one of those years. The first card was a photo card with a wedding picture of us on it. In the years after that and before we had kids I think there was one other photo card in the mix (a picture of us with our then dog). Since The Boy was born we have sent a photo card in some shape or form. I’ve made a few of the cards myself, taking a snapshot of The Boy and editing it to make it stand out in some way. The last two years I was organized enough to schedule photo shoots with a professional photographer, so we used cards from her. This year I haven’t given it much thought. I was living in bliss pretending that I wasn’t going to let the idea of Christmas cards haunt me, that we would just skip it this year. That was until I started getting Christmas cards in the mail.

Now I find myself daydreaming at work, wondering what fun idea I can come up with for homemade photo cards. I do have an ample supply of cardstock, and the 4x6 photo printer to draw from. I just need some inspiration. Sometimes I can just look through pictures of the kids and it will hit me, but not this year. I like making photo cards of the kids, but I can’t just send a random picture, I feel the need to show off my mad Photoshop skills. The card is a vehicle to show off my

incredibly cute children, and to show that I do have some creativity crammed inside of my analytical head. So much self-imposed pressure wrapped up into a Christmas card *sigh*.

I asked T whether he cares if we send Christmas cards this year, and he answered with a resounding NO. I knew all along that the cards were my thing, but he confirmed it for me. Part of me does want to skip the whole rigmarole, but another part loves getting cards from friends and family and wants to keep up the tradition. I tend to get really wrapped up in my work, the house, the kids, T, and I forget to take the time to tend to my old friendships. Sometimes the card at Christmas is the only contact we have with some of our friends, and I guess I like holding onto the past. Even though life has changed and we’ve grown apart from some friends, I still do wish them well, and want to remember them around the holidays. I guess I’ve just answered for myself; to card it is…now to find some inspiration quickly.

Extended Calves

2007-12-09T21:27:00.000-06:00

I've never liked that term. I am the proud owner of big old muscular calves. Even if managed to shrink from my current size 6 frame I would still be the proud owner of big old muscular calves. It is a blessing and a curse. For the most part I don't mind my calves, they are what they are, and I don't put much thought into wishing they were smaller. The one exception is when I see someone wearing big tall boots. I get a little twinge of envy. I start remembering the shopping trip with my two girlfriends to find me a pair of tall boots.

I didn't buy any boots that day. I must have tried on at least 10 pairs of boots, but none of them fit over my monstrous calves. I was deflated. I wanted my slut boots, but the gods were telling me to go back home and forget about it.

Oh sure I could have just ordered a nice pair of Extended Calf boots, because at that point I couldn't find any such animal in the stores. I didn't want to buy boots by mail order, I wanted to try them on first. It was a huge buzz kill. I wanted those boots, was convinced I needed them, but was left with a horrible taste in my mouth when I couldn't find any that fit.

Now it is at least 6 or maybe 7 years later and I still don't have any slut boots. I still want some. I think I've gotten over the extended calf name now, and can live with the fact that I can't fit into normal boots. What I really want to know is do the rest of you really have calves that are so tiny??? I mean my calves aren't that big. Do you have trouble standing for long periods of time? I mean obviously I must need that chunk of muscle for something, so what is my genetic advantage doing for me? It must be an advantage right?

Angel on the treadmill

2007-12-05T21:18:00.000-06:00

It is winter here in the frozen north. We've gotten enough snow this week that I have traded in my morning outdoor runs for morning treadmill runs. Truth be told I've been intermingling treadmill runs in my routine for about a month, because sometimes it is just too cold to run outside...and dark. I used to just settle for watching the local news while on the treadmill, it is okay but they repeat themselves every 15 minutes or so which gets old.

A while back I was flipping through channels and settled on Angel on TNT. I had one brief stint in time of watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer, so I wasn't unfamiliar with Angel. I decided it was worth a shot, and now I am hooked. I now spend less time slurping my pre-run coffee and checking email because I want to get down to the treadmill so I can see more of Angel. It seems to be on at 5 AM and 6 AM each and every weekday morning. I typically catch the end of the 5 AM show, and the beginning of the 6 AM show. This is okay, but it leaves me with big blanks in the happenings of the show. Thankfully they do a good job of recapping previous shows at the beginning of episodes, but I still have to piece together many details. I also have to endure really long commercial breaks, which isn't ideal.

So what is a girl to do? I could buy Angel seasons on DVD, but I don't think I would want to watch them multiple times. I think the better solution is to get a netflix subscription so I can rent Angel seasons, and then other shows when I'm done with Angel...I should start with Buffy I suppose....Charmed looks interesting to fill this treadmill viewing need too. The other option would be to get a second DVR so I can watch recorded shows in the basement, so many choices to make and so much of my cheapness to set in and stop all of them...I predict more parts of shows with plenty of commercials in my future.

We interrupt this show

2007-12-04T20:47:00.001-06:00

My kids lead very sheltered lives. They watch the majority of their TV shows from recordings on our DVR, PBS kids live, sometimes Playhouse Disney live, and very occasionally Noggin live. All of these formats share the common thread of no commercials during the actual shows. They all have their own little versions of commercials in between shows, but there are typically no show interruptions to contend with.

This holiday season we've been letting the kids watch Christmas special shows on Live network television, with *gasp* commercials. As soon as a commercial comes on The Girl screams "I don't like this show," and is quite upset, assuming we have changed the channel without her approval. The Boy has caught on, he used to protest similarly, now he just says "it's just a commercial."

Excuses, Who needs excuses?

2007-12-01T07:45:00.000-06:00

I have been absent from this blog. I blame work. I blame the kids. I blame everything else in my life, oh and I blame myself. I have no good excuses, just the fact that work has stepped up to an entirely new level of busy in the past few months. I have very little downtime at work. I've had to stop (mostly) surfing my message board addictions, and forget about posting on them. After the kids are asleep for the night I find that I have no witty banter left in me, and I never feel much like just writing something for the sake of filling up space (no offence to all of you NoBloPo folks but frankly your posts every single frick'n day of November were not always up to your usual standards...not that I had time to read all of them). I decided that while everyone else was posting every day of November I would post very few days of November, you know to balance things out. Okay I didn't really think that through, but in hindsight it sounds probable.

I will try to post more this month, but I've also decided to try to make my default (meaning that I can do that distance on autopilot) 4 mile runs turn into default 5 mile runs this winter and if I have to pick one goal I think the running one will win.

Rookie mistakes

2007-11-12T21:29:00.000-06:00

The Boy started preschool this year. It has been an interesting time. The first few weeks he was completely thrilled with school, asking every day if it was a school day. We were excited because he seemed to be flourishing. Then he started not wanting to go to school. T came home one day (after picking The Boy and his carpool buddy up from preschool) and told me that the teachers were concerned because The Boy had been “sad” that day. I picked him up the next time, and his main teacher expressed the same concern to me. There was talk of a special program The Boy could participate in, a program that involved being pulled out of his class for ten minutes a time, to work on his “self-esteem.”

My knee jerk reaction was to be appalled by the program. The whole point of him being in a big group preschool was for him to get used to a group of kids his age. His self esteem is fine. We talked about it for a while and decided that my knee jerk reaction was right for him. We didn’t sign the permission slip and there has been no mention of it since. There has, however, been mention of the teacher with the “mean voice” from The Boy. It seems that one of the teachers is a bit too forceful for our sensitive little guy to handle. He is afraid of her. I was so impressed that he was able to articulate his fears to me that I made the mistake of focusing on them way too much. I think what I effectively did was to validate his fears and enforce them. I’m such a rookie.

We had a week of The Boy refusing to ride with his carpool (to get from daycare to preschool), and now we are at a point of asking our DCP to help physically force him into the carpool vehicle. At school he is fine. He has a great time. When we pick him up he is all smiles and will profess that he loves school…until it is preschool day again. Tomorrow is another preschool day, and my guess is that he will tell me that he wants to stay at daycare instead of going to school. I will ignore and redirect and tell me that he will have lots of fun at preschool, remind him of all of the fun crafts they do there, and grit my teeth and hope that today is the day he remembers how fun school is.

Rookie mistakes, how many more do you think I can make this year?

Super Why the costume

2007-10-30T19:19:00.002-06:00

I just had to share the great success we had with the Super Why costume. T's Mom made the costume basically from scratch, and without a pattern. We couldn't find green pajamas, though after reading the comments on my Super Why post we might have been able to find a solution...the unitards would be perfect but then $50 is A LOT for a part of a Halloween costume no? My handiwork was limited to scrounging a SuperWhy graphic from the PBS kids website, and printing it onto iron on paper (T ironed it on because I got performance anxiety). The Boy had a long sleeved blue shirt already so it became the under layer, otherwise the costume is all thanks to T's fabulous Mom. We love you!

So without further ado, here is The Boy modeling his Super Why costume at his daycare Halloween party last night:

If you are looking for Super Why costume ideas please see this post, that I have added after getting many comments here and emails about this subject.

And well because she is so darn cute as a cowgirl (She insists Jessie from Toy Story 2):

A traveling Mom

2007-10-17T21:39:00.000-05:00

It is my last night away from home this week. I miss my own bed, my kids, my husband, and just being able to change into comfy yoga pants upon finishing my work day.

Sometimes I let myself slip into the mode of a non traveling working Mom, but then I am jolted back to reality with a 3 night (really 4 nights away from the kids) trip. It is on these trips, these lonely nights in hotel rooms, that I start to consider looking for another job. Certainly there are good things about my job, but how do I get past the fact that the travel is ever present? It is like a threat that is constantly hanging over my head. I live in fear of the next project that will take me away from my children for several nights in many different stretches. It is part of my job. It is part of my life, but it is a part of my life that can sometimes take long vacations. When I'm on vacation from traveling I become the normal working Mom who just has to juggle the normal working mom stuff, and I really like my life. I like working. I like being with my kids in the morning and the evening (well sometimes those mornings can still be a bit hectic and drive me a little crazy). Then a trip appears on my calendar, and the dread sets in.

My husband is fabulous, he never complains about my travel, or the fact that he has to shoulder all of the childcare while I am gone. Sometimes I wish he would complain just a little bit though. I wish he didn't make it so easy for me to travel. I don't prep things for him. I don't make a list of things that need to be done, I don't set out clothing for the kids. I know he can handle it, and that the kids will be fed and happy (though they might not get vegetables with dinner). I just take care of me, and go. I call each night to check in with him and talk to the kids, sometimes we Skype with the webcams, sometimes we just talk. I can see them at home just having a normal evening, a normal evening that I want to be part of. I'm not missing any milestones. I'm not scarring my children for life. I am just missing the day-to-day. You simply cannot connect with a four year old and a two year old over the phone the same way you can in person. Even with the benefit of the webcam it isn't the same. I am not there. I cannot kiss their heads, smooth The Boy's soft soft hair with my hand, cuddle with The Girl, rock her before bed, pretend to sit on her when she scurries into her bedroom and climbs up into the rocking chair in the dark all the while giggling and waiting for me to say "where is she? Why is this seat so lumpy? Oh there she is!", come back into The Boy's room to give him one more big squish. I miss the normal stuff.

I know I am not the only traveling Mom out there. I'd like to be a beacon of hope to other traveling Moms, or at least get to the point that the prospect of travel doesn't fill me with dread. I don't know how to get there though. Is it possible to travel for work frequently without letting it get you down? How do all of those traveling Dad's cope? Is it just too different to compare?

Searching for inspiration

2007-10-03T10:18:00.000-05:00

I’ve ready many blog posts in this spirit, and since I am struggling for inspiration lately I thought I would create one of my own. I was reading through the keywords that brought people to my blog, and wanted to share a few with you.

Babysitter calculator – Also babysitting rate calculator, babysitting calculator, how much to pay a babysitter, babysitter pay calculator, baby sitter rate calculator, babysitter rate calculator, how much to pay a babysitter per hour…I could go on for a few more paragraphs though my absolute favorite is: what to pay a one time babysitter – is that like a one night stand, it sounds kind of dirty.

Johnny and the sprites songs – see also Johnny and the sprites theme song or “Johnny and the sprites” theme song, and perhaps goofy sprites, Johnny and the sprites minnie show, Johnny and the sprites pictures, and my favorite: Johnny and the sprites horrible. I think the bounce rate was pretty high for most of those searches. Sorry, I guess my Johnny and the Sprites hatred isn’t shared by everyone.

“b cup” padded – hmmm I only wish I could still claim to be that size.

“leave the door open” pee – um okay, see also: blog modesty pee – 100% bounce rate…I guess I wasn’t exactly what that searcher had in mind…though I have no idea what you’d be looking for with that search. There was also: peeing with the door open – you too?

Are hot tubs trashy? – Well not necessarily but I suppose if you filled one with cigarette butts as my kids like to do they can be.

Drain hot tub when going on vacation – but then how will you attract a good housesitter?

How hot can hottub water be for a 10 month old baby? – I say just leave the baby out of the hot tub; he will probably just pee in it anyway.

Biting siblings 4 years old – there is no better activity

How to cook beef jerky fast – I think you just go to the store and buy it, aside from that I say just don’t bother

Slim-fast running – If you can keep down a can of slim-fast while running I admire you, I’m pretty sure it would make me vomit.

The best treadmilling shoes – just in case you don’t know, ‘treadmilling’ is not a real word.

www .you tub .com – Is this a spin-off from YouTube? I don’t want to think about the target audience of YouTub.

Okay there are many more, but I’ve grown bored with this activity.

Super Why!

2007-10-02T12:46:00.000-05:00

Move over Tyrone, Tasha, Uniqua, Austin, and Pablo, you’ve been replaced as the most beloved in our DVR line-up. Super Whyatt (not my spelling error) has come to town, and The Boy is in love with him. He has figured out how to run the DVR on his own, and can make Super Why appear on a whim. We have had to correct him several times, insisting that he must get permission from us before he watches a television show. It is a little cute, a little disturbing, and a little weird for me to see him so obsessed with something. He has never been one to fixate on one thing for a prolonged period (well he has held on rather strongly to the notion that if he asks for something for Christmas it will appear under our tree Christmas morning…boy is he going to be disappointed when he doesn’t get the 5000 things he has asked for already).

T’s Mom is busy making The Boy a Super Why costume for Halloween, which has me hunting for plain green knit pajamas (which apparently don’t exist). The Boy is adamant that the costume be green with a BLUE cape, and that he have a green mask for over his eyes. He even made himself a “super computer” at daycare last week. An old cigar box with buttons (as in buttons from clothing) glued inside did the trick for him. He also begged his daycare provider to give him some letters so he could spell Super Why. Our DCP is not big on doing letter drills with the kids, since her daycare is modeled after a Waldorf style of play centered activities, but she did end up digging up some letters after he prodded her for a few days. He promptly found a “W” and a “Y” and told her that he just needed an “H” so he could spell Super Why. This is the same boy who got mad at me just a few months ago when I tried to get him to say the alphabet. He is now walking around saying “Ta ta, teeee, wuh, wuh, double-u.”

I have to say that I really believe that most of this is coming from just watching Super Why (albeit every single day). He did start preschool this year, but as far as I can tell they do not do any sort of letter drills just yet. It is shocking that a PBS show can really teach kids when they are ready for it (The Girl is not as big on the show…and would prefer to be watching The Backyardigans or Curious George, or anything else). Of course he has been playing on starfall occasionally for a few months, so perhaps the Super Why is just reinforcing things he has seen before…in a much more fun way. I guess it is okay for him to be focused on reading right now, even if it wasn’t my intent to force it upon him so soon. I really do want him to just be a kid, and to learn through play before classroom learning comes and takes the fun out of everything. I’m all at once happy that he is making such progress and sad that my little boy is getting sucked into the world of phonics.

Comfortably numb

2007-09-21T12:40:00.000-05:00

I know that when the kids are behaving horribly it only makes matters worse when I get angry. If I get angry, they sense it, and their behavior gets worse. I know this yet, sometimes I find myself in that cycle of increasing anger anyway. When your children wake you up at 4:30 AM, and you are all over tired and miserable it is hard to behave rationally. The children are crabby, and more prone to horrible behavior, and I am less likely to deal with the horrible behavior in a good way.

It is on days like those when I want to be the one who leaves for work first, the one who doesn’t have to get the kids from a state of pajamas and empty tummies, to one of daycare appropriate clothing and at least partially filled tummies. I want to be the one who doesn’t have to fight with the children to get them into the car. I want to be the one who can calmly tell me later “you shouldn’t let it get to you so much.” I want to be the one who thinks first about his need to get to work, and how much work he needs to accomplish this day, rather than about the hundreds of little things that need to be done for the children and for the household. I want to be the one who calls home at 5:30 PM and asks if I’ve already picked up the kids from daycare (daycare that closes at 5:30 PM). I want to be the one who can work from 7 AM until 6 PM with no thought of how my children got from their beds to daycare and back home again. I want to be the one whose job comes first, whose job is more important, and who’s simply not able to leave work after working for 8 hours. I want to be the one who can come home and eat dinner and then sit on the couch reading a book until one of the children or I make him engage the family in some way. I want to be the one who the children scream “Not you, only Mommy can do it” at when I try to help them. I want to be the one who can turn off all things family while I’m at work. I want to be the one who doesn’t have to worry about how all of that yelling in the morning is shaping our children negatively. I want to disengage at will.

I want all of it, or at least I would want it, until I had it for five minutes.

PS. To lighten the mood a bit, I just have to post a shout out to my Mom. Happy 60th Birthday Mom! I hope you are having a fabulous time in Vegas with my dear brother and his dear wife, can't wait to see you next month!

Sharing the cuteness

2007-09-19T14:10:00.000-05:00

Upper left: The Boy on his first day of school
Upper right: The Girl demonstrates her shirt over her head skills
Bottom row: Hanging at the zoo

Give me a boost(er seat)

2007-09-18T10:01:00.001-05:00

The Boy is four years old, and just maybe a pound or two shy of 40 pounds. Our current carseat situation includes a grand total of four carseats (make that five with the one we purchased yesterday evening). We have a pair of Britax Marathons, and a pair of Evenflo Triumph Vs that remain in our vehicles. This pairing has worked well for us since The Girl outgrew her infant bucket seat. We purchased the Marathons because they allow for 5-point harness usage up to 60 pounds.

We had intended to continue using this pairing of carseats until The Girl reached the height/and or weight limit for the Triumph seats, but we now have a snag in that plan. The Boy began preschool last week. He needs to get from daycare to preschool and then from preschool to home two days per week. We were very thankful that another of his daycare mates is in his preschool class, as this meant we could come up with a carpool arrangement. The snag in the carseat paring comes in when we concluded that it just isn’t possible to fit even the tiny portable low-back booster (our fifth carseat) between the two carseats in my 2000 Honda CRV. There isn’t even a shoulder belt in that position so even if we could fit the carseat there it wouldn’t be safe.

We’ve decided to buy The Boy a booster seat to use in my car from here on out. When his buddy is in the car with him, he will ride in the Marathon (which will otherwise become The Girl’s), and she will ride in the booster seat. When he is in the car with his sister he will ride in the booster seat. As we were contemplating this carseat switcheroo I started seeing the memory You Tube video of the little boy who died when his seatbelt failed in my head, but I had to squash it. I just can’t see spending the money on another Marathon at this point. A big part of me really looks forward to The Boy being able to easily fasten his own seat belt in the booster seat…one less kid to strap in sounds downright heavenly to me. Does it make me a bad Mom to not want to deal with a 5-point harness anymore?
We are looking at the Britax Parkway, anyone have it or another you could tell me about?

Sizing it up

2007-09-13T09:54:00.000-05:00

I was recently shopping for some fall clothing for my kids (at Target). The Girl needed some new pants and a few long-sleeved shirts that don't scream "this is a hand-me-down from my brother can't you tell!" The Boy needed a new fall jacket, and a few pairs of pants. I had good luck finding the items for The Girl, she is a tall 2 year old with a long torso, so she is generally wearing size 2T (only if it sports an adjustable waistband) for pants and a 3T for shirts.

The Boy is a little trickier to shop for though. He has the same micro waist his sister has so adjustable waistbands are a necessity. He is almost too tall for 4T pants now, but I guess we will just make him wear high-waters this fall. I am at a loss for what size to buy him. I do occasionally see 5T sized clothes, but not always. I've ventured over to the "boys" section and see size 4 and size 5 clothing, but when comparing to the T series clothes they seem much bigger and baggier (which translates to very sloppy looking 4 year old). Does it make sense that a 5T sized shirt would look like it fits The Boy well, but a size 4/5 shirt looks like he is borrowing one of my old shirts for the day? Is this a result of style, do I just have to get used to my cute little boy swimming in his clothing before he can even demand such a thing?

I found this website, which gives a great summary of the size ranges for kids clothing. I think I will take The Boy's measurements to see where he falls.

Compilations

2007-09-11T12:10:00.000-05:00

I wrote this post several months ago, but never published it, then came back to it again a few months later and still didn't publish it. I decided that today is a fitting day to finally take these thoughts out of my computer and share them with you.

As I was driving to work one morning a few weeks ago I was flipping between radio stations searching for decent music. I stumbled upon a station playing a compilation song. Perhaps this is a local phenomenon, but I’d guess not. I couldn’t tell you the song it was put to because I didn’t listen for very long. It was some sort of tribute to the US troops fighting the war in Iraq or other various places. It was a touching song, with snippets from people who called in to offer their support and well wishes. I felt like vomiting. I changed the station settling on a Jewel song which wasn’t much of an improvement. Now don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against offering words of support to our troops, but I don’t want to hear a tacky radio compilation of poor voice quality recordings intermingled with music. It reminded me of my drive back from Denver after September 11th, 2001. I’d been flying to San Francisco the morning of September 11th, and when they grounded all air traffic we were forced to divert to Denver. I won’t go into details, but I ended up managing to borrow a car from my company’s Denver sales office to get me back home. I didn’t want to wait out the air traffic nightmare to get me home.

Along my long drive home I flipped endlessly between radio stations, and it seemed that compilation songs were everywhere. I finally stopped at a Target en route to buy some CDs so I had other options. I don’t think I was ever bothered by compilation songs before that drive home, but now whenever I hear one I go right back to that trip. I’m not sure why it stirs up such a negative response from me; the trip back wasn’t all that horrible. I did have an intense longing to get back home as quickly as possible. I think every single person who had my cell phone number (and even some who didn’t have it before that day) called me on September 11th to make sure I was safe. They all knew I was a frequent flier and wanted to make sure that by some crazy coincidence I wasn’t on one of the ill-fated flights. I felt tremendously loved; family, friends, coworkers, and acquaintances called to check on me. I think many people felt an urge to just hunker down with their families after such a tragedy, and that was certainly the case for me. I needed to get back home as quickly as possible, driving all the way from Denver to Lincoln, Nebraska in one evening, and continuing home the next morning.

I wasn’t one to want to sit and watch the news coverage of the tragedy for hours upon hours though. Mostly I wanted to be home, to feel grounded, and return to some sort of normalcy. Listening to the compilation songs was only making me think more about the tragic events, and was bringing me down. Some people need to deal with catastrophes by learning all that they can about why it happened. I need to move on quickly so I don’t bog myself down with depressing details. That may sound callous, but that is how I function. I guess I am the same way with the war in Iraq. I catch my updates on The Daily Show, but aside from that I mostly tune it out. I know I am guilty of a “not my problem” mentality. There is a group of people who periodically hold up “bring the troops home” signs along my drive home from work. They stand on the sides of a busy intersection with “honk for peace” signs as well. I never honk. I try to avert my eyes. It isn’t that I don’t want peace, or that I don’t want the troops to come home, because I do. I just don’t want to think about it any more than I have to.

Before the 2004 presidential election I got all fired up wanting to get rid of Bush, but it didn’t happen. Our country is now in far worse shape then it was even in 2004. I tell myself that if thinking about it didn’t help, not thinking about it isn’t going make it worse and at least I am spared the mental anguish along the way. I’ll keep flipping away from compilation songs because listening to them isn’t the answer. Somehow we managed to get in this position as a country, and I can’t help but feel that it is because so many other people just don’t want to think about it either. The songs might provide some comfort to the families who have members serving in the armed forces, but they aren’t changing the status quo. Spreading democracy through warfare makes about as much sense as chopping off an arm to cure a hangnail, but there we are. Perhaps one day we will wake up and realize that it isn’t the responsibility of the United States to save the rest of the countries of the world from themselves. 4000 years of fighting isn’t going to end because we say “don’t you want to be like us?” I would say that generally people don’t like it when you occupy their country and tell them you know what is best for them. I can also attest to the fact that I don’t enjoy being encouraged to live in fear of what might happen. The more we fear, the more likely we are to have something to be afraid of.

I’m not sure why I felt compelled to write this post, it has been sitting in my drafts for quite a while unpublished. I think my desire to post it is fueled by the fact that I want to wake up from my slumber, but I’m still rubbing the sleep from my eyes. I listened to part of the interim report on the progress in Iraq yesterday. I was most struck by the tone our president used before opening up to questions from reporters. Most of all it seems our president wants us to be afraid, afraid of terrorists, afraid for the future of Iraq, afraid of Iran, afraid, afraid, and afraid. His presidency has been one built almost entirely on fear. This presidency is a sharp contrast from other presidencies in dark times for our country. I think FDR was quite wise when he gave his inaugural address:

I am certain that my fellow Americans expect that on my induction into the
Presidency I will address them with a candor and a decision which the present
situation of our people impel. This is preeminently the time to speak the truth,
the whole truth, frankly and boldly. Nor need we shrink from honestly facing
conditions in our country today. This great Nation will endure as it has
endured, will revive and will prosper. So, first of all, let me assert my firm
belief that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself—nameless, unreasoning,
unjustified terror which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into
advance. In every dark hour of our national life a leadership of frankness and
vigor has met with that understanding and support of the people themselves which
is essential to victory.

While our president certainly does a good job of pointing out who were are supposed to fear, he is lacking the frankness and honesty required to overcome the fear. It seems as though we are supposed to behave as obedient children, doing as we are told, not questioning the great patriarch who knows better than we do. The only way this strategy can be effective is if we as a country are all too afraid to speak out against it. I’m not going to live in fear anymore. It isn’t healthy. It isn’t in our country’s best interest to remain fearful long-term, this does nothing but fuel hate, resentment, and greed.

A fish tale

2007-09-10T20:47:00.000-05:00

As we felt summer coming to an end a few weeks back, T decided that The Boy really needed to have the opportunity to use the fishing pole he received for his fourth birthday. The problem all along has been that T doesn't fish, so we kept saying it was up to one of The Boy's Grandfathers to take him fishing. Well as you know, life often gets in the way, and it just didn't happen. T somehow remembered that this little rite of passage needed to take place and took his Dad and The Boy fishing after dinner on Labor Day. The Boy caught 4 fish on his first outing. Beginners luck?

Saturday we decided to take both kids fishing at one of the local lakes. Grandpa came along since he has the requisite fishing license (T really doesn't fish), and seems to like hanging out with us. The Boy caught 11 fish, and had a blast (all very tiny fish that were returned to the water in relative health). The Girl and I found a nearby playground after about 10 minutes of fishing.

It is so fun to watch my kids experience things for the first time, even if they are things like fishing that I don't particularly enjoy doing. I definitely have fond memories of fishing with my Dad as a kid, and I'm happy that my kids will get to fish with their Grandfathers.

and with their Dad

Some breathing room

2007-09-07T13:58:00.000-05:00

I got home from an overnight business trip just after the kids were in bed last night. T had just come downstairs when I walked in the door. He indicated that the kids knew I was home, because as he was rocking The Girl she said “Mommy’s Home!” when she heard the door open. He told her that maybe I would come up and check on her before she fell asleep. I made my way upstairs to unpack, and as soon as I flicked on the bedroom light, I heard a chorus of “Mommy” from the kids’ respective bedrooms. I finished unpacking and went into The Boy’s room first, knowing that he would be the easier to deal with. I gave him a hug and a kiss told him that I’d missed him, and said goodnight. He actually let me leave his room with no calls for one more cuddle. I went into The Girl’s room next, and she popped up and demanded to be rocked, which of course I agreed to. As I sat in the glider rocking her, The Boy appeared in her room and told me that he needed me to tell him a story. I told him that he’d already read stories with T and that he needed to go to sleep, but he persisted. He didn’t want to read a book; he wanted me to tell him a story about Him and his sister. I agreed, and quickly made up a story about the two of them, and their wild adventures. At the conclusion of the story I put The Girl down in her crib, and walked The Boy back to his bedroom, and they both went to sleep.

I went back downstairs after they were in bed, and chatted with T for a few minutes. We caught up on the kids, work, and household stuff I’d missed. It felt so good to be home. Most of my major work deadlines of late have been met, and for the first time in a long time I didn’t feel like I should be doing something more productive with my time. It felt great for about 2 hours. Now I’m bored.

Too busy to blog

2007-08-27T11:10:00.000-05:00

I've been slammed at work for the past few weeks, so that is my lame excuse for being neglectful here. I had to travel for work last week (all of last week, got back yesterday afternoon after leaving the previous Monday), and didn't have regular internet access during that time. Now I'm faced with another looming work deadline, so I need to make myself scarce again. I'll try to pop in when I can, but I don't expect to post anything of substance until next week...and I have another deadline next week.

We've hit the potty jackpot

2007-08-19T15:39:00.000-05:00

For my long time readers you may remember that we had a bit of trouble potty training The Boy. Eventually it worked, but there was much frustration on my part before it did. The Girl is just 2 years and 3 months old and she is already basically potty trained. I credit daycare for this feat, because we certainly didn't initiate the process. The Boy was over 3.5 before training did anything, so I just assumed we had another year of diapers ahead of us. I even recently purchased a mega pack of Kirkland diapers from Costco, but I'm not sure we will need them all. The Girl has been in her new underwear all weekend, and has remained accident free.

Way to go honey, and thanks for taking it upon yourself to potty train, your parents are too lazy to help you in that department. I think that perhaps you are trying to make up for being so ornery your first 4 months of life, and your parents greatly appreciate it!

Hello treadmill my old friend

2007-08-14T16:06:00.001-05:00

Forgive this post, but as I was running on the treadmill this fine morning I started composing a sad and lame little version of the awesome Simon and Garfunkel tune The Sound of Silence. The background is that I was running on my incredibly loud treadmill early in the morning, and my children woke up in the middle of my run. If you can finish it with treadmill running appropriate lyrics for the last two verses of the song I will bow down to you. I started watching the local news after I got these three verses down:

Hello treadmill, my old friend,
I’ve come to run on you again,
Because my husband who is trav-ling,
Left our kids while they were sleeping,
And the addiction that was planted in my brain
Still remains
Within the sound of loudness.

In restless dreams I ran alone
Narrow streets of cobblestone,
neath the halo of a closet light,
I turned my shoes to the hard and fake
When my eyes were stabbed by the flash of
A red L-E-D
That split the dawn
And touched the sound of loudness.

And in the dim light I saw
Two other people, maybe more.
Children waking without screaming,
Children whining without listening,
Children disturbing runs that mommies couldn’t share
And they both dared
Disturb the sound of loudness.

The Telephone Game

2007-08-10T20:09:00.000-05:00

Here’s a fun little link-sharing Meme, courtesy of Fracas, that could devolve rather quickly into something a little less than wholesome:

Remember when we were kids and at every opportunity, some adult would have us play that silly Telephone game? You know… the one where the lead person comes up with a sentence or statement, whispers it into the ear of the next person in line, and the sentence is passed from person to person until it reaches the end of the line. The last person then repeats the sentence out loud, the first person announces what it actually was, and everyone gets to laugh about how goofy it got by being passed from ear to ear and being altered because of mispronunciations and hearing ability.
Of course I realize that the game was simply a means for adults to keep us in line while we were waiting for something or killing time. Haven’t we even now as adults, tried to use it on our own kids?
Being the silly kind of fracas that I am, I’ve decided to create an internet version of the game, and use it as an opportunity for link-getting. Everyone wants links, and yet lots of people I know, prefer to get their links in a non-obvious kind of way. We’ve all done the “copy this list and create a post and you’ll get links” type of tag…at least once, but most of us don’t want to fill our blogs with those posts. It may get links, but eventually will chase readers away.
This is a fun way to give your readers something entertaining to read and get a few links too.

Instructions:
If you’ve been tagged, check the last entry on the list. Copy this entire post, add your name and link to the end of the list, copy the sentence in the previous person’s entry and change ONE word in it to try and change the meaning of the sentence for your entry. Name and link only ONE person to tag and then post the whole thing as a new entry in your own blog. Please make sure to transfer all the links to your post otherwise you aren’t providing fair linkage to the people before you. Although this will take longer to get around, by tagging only one person you will avoid making mass enemies by having to tag many people, and it will also guarantee only one true version of the game is circulating out there. Fracas, the creator, will attempt to keep tabs on the game and periodically report on it.
Please try not to tag someone you see is already on the list. If you’re on the list, have been tagged again by someone who didn’t pay attention to the instructions and you don’t want to do another turn, please leave a comment at this post over at Fracas, and Fracas will take your turn for you in order to keep the list going.

1. Fracas - http://fracas.wordpress.com/
writes:Never continue dating anyone who is rude to the waiter.

2. Mark @ Blogitude - http://www.blogitude.com/
writes:Never continue dating anyone who is nude to the waiter.

3. Wiggy - @ http://damewigginsoflee.wordpress.com/
Forever continue dating anyone who is nude to the waiter.

4. Froggy @ The Road Less Traveled - http://froglette79.wordpress.com/
Forever continue dating anyone who is nude under the waiter.

5. InTheFastLane@ That's Life - http://thatslifev2.blogspot.com/
Forever continue dating anyone who is nude under the water.

6. Treadmillista @ Just Treadmilling Around - http://treadmillinginplace.blogspot.com/
Forever continue dating everyone who is nude under the water

I Tag...Christine @ Watch me! no, watch me! - http://watchmenowatchme.blogspot.com/

And modesty has left the building

2007-08-09T20:58:00.000-05:00

The other Moms of kids old enough to open doorknobs can likely relate to this...I hope. It has been at least 3 years since I have been able to pee in privacy. Oh sure at first I made the cursory attempt to shut the bathroom door while I peed, but after hundreds of screams of MOMMY I NEEEEED you with pounding on the door and me having to get off of the toilet to open the door, I stopped shutting the door much less locking it. Occasionally I shut the door now, only to have a toddler or preschooler burst in on me aghast that I would shut them out of the room I'm in. It used to bother me, but now peeing with the door open has become my new normal. It is so extreme now that even when the kids are in bed I leave the door open while peeing.

T walked in on me peeing a few weeks ago (after the kids were in bed), and gave me a load of crap about it. Not only is it not his new normal, but he has never given in to the whole peeing with the door open idea. He still very much shuts doors when he uses the bathroom, a commendable trait I suppose. I have noticed that the kids don't pound on the door when he is in the bathroom, there is no DAAAADY I NEEED YOU. They give him his space, his privacy, they leave him alone. I know there have been knocks on the door when he is using the bathroom, but he mostly ignores them until he is done. Perhaps I need to try his approach, because the whole peeing with the door open isn't exactly my cup of tea. Any bets as to how this little experiment will turn out?

How much to pay a babysitter

2007-08-07T15:41:00.000-05:00

I stumbled upon a babysitting rate calculator a while back. Mostly out of curiosity I entered the information which fits our household and our normal babysitter. I was given the rate of $5.75 per hour, which is in the ballpark of what we've paid in the past. I usually feel like an idiot when it comes time to pay our babysitter, because we have never really discussed her rate. Why is it that I trust this girl to watch my kids, but yet feel uncomfortable asking her how much she expects to be paid? Of course as someone who babysat plenty as a teen, I don't think I ever gave parents a set rate, just accepted whatever they gave me. I was likely underpaid then, when I made $2.00 an hour for watching FOUR kids, the youngest of whom was in diapers.

Anyway, I am posting this mainly because I'm curious to see how accurate the calculator is for other areas. Is it in the ballpark for you?

How the podcast ruined my run

2007-08-05T13:52:00.000-05:00

A few weeks back I discovered that I could download free podcasts from Itunes. It didn't seem all that exciting at first, but when I realized that I could replace the old tired music on my little Ipod Shuffle with podcasts for my runs I got a little thrill. So this morning I set out for my 10 miler armed with a water bottle, my cell phone, a baseball cap, and my magenta Shuffle filled with podcasts. The first mile was filled with music, but then I found a podcast and got engrossed. I made it through mile 6 or so on that first podcast (Manic Mommies if you are interested), and then Wait Wait Don't Tell Me came on. Ahhh, what a great show that is! I was so engrossed in listening to the shows that I forgot to worry about all of the aches and pains that can sometimes accompany a run. I also forgot to pay attention to my pace. My first mile was done in a respectable 9:15, but the rest of the run was downhill from there. I had only one other sub 10:00 minute mile today because I was running like I wasn't even trying. Oh well, I think I usually run my long runs too fast, so perhaps this was good for me. If nothing else it felt like the fastest 10 miler I've ever done...even if it was more than 10 minutes slower than I would have liked.

If you have any good podcasts to pass along please do so, my weekend long runs will be ever so grateful for new things to divert my attention from the fact that my feet are continually pounding against the pavement for miles on end.

Remodel: DONE!

2007-08-04T21:25:00.000-05:00

I’ve been a little lazy about posting the final before and after pictures, but without further ado here they are (click on the images to see them full size):

The kitchen

The dining room and entry way

The living room

The office

And the bathroom (I never took a before picture, for reference there was carpet, ghastly wallpaper, and lots of open space for a former half bathroom)

We are very happy with the outcome, and we were happy with our contractor. The project moved along quickly, we were well informed along the way, and when there was a big snag at the end they came through and made everything right. Looking at the before and after pictures really allows us to see just how different our house is now. We love our house now, and we would never have said that before. Now to buy some furniture, hang things on the walls, and just get comfortable in the space again.

Mashed potato tacos

2007-08-03T21:12:00.000-05:00

I'm not quite sure what this says about me, but I found a link to this recipe on one of the message boards I frequent and I cannot stop thinking about making it. Not only have I decided that it is perfectly acceptable for T and the kids to eat omelets for dinner while I eat a vat of guacamole with chips (I added some lettuce and some tomatoes so I feel like it was actually a fairly healthy meal for me), but now I am dreaming of eating mashed potato tacos. No, I am not pregnant. Mashed potatoes, cheese, sour cream, french fried onions, taco shells, what more could you ask for? Of course I was thinking that perhaps it might taste even better with cream cheese instead of sour cream. I might end up declaring myself too lazy and just eating the entire can of french fried onions though, so I should resist the urge to buy the ingredients.

It could have been me

2007-08-02T10:19:00.000-05:00

Yesterday started out as any Wednesday does in my world, nothing out of the ordinary occurred. I went through my day, going to work, picking up the kids from daycare, having dinner, etc, and then I got a phone call from T. He had taken The Girl to the hardware store with him, The Boy and I were home putzing around in the yard when the phone rang. T asked me if I was watching TV, if I had heard the news, what news I said. The bridge on 35W over the river collapsed. What? It collapsed? I instantly forgot about the lawn watering we were attempting and took The Boy inside. Turned on the TV and then sat there horrified by what I was seeing. When T had said the bridge over the river, I had thought immediately of the bridge over the Minnesota River which is much closer to our house, but no it was the bridge over the Mississippi. How could this happen? Just 10-15 miles from our house this huge tragedy took place, and was unfolding before our eyes.

Now I can’t stop myself from watching/reading/listening to any coverage I can find. Seeing Matt Lauer covering the story in Minneapolis live this morning struck a chord with me. This National story feels so personal to me. That bridge hasn’t been part of my daily commute for many years, but as a born and bred Minnesotan, someone who attended the University of Minnesota, and lived so very near to that bridge at one point in my life, it just feels like my world has been violated. I can’t even count how many times I have driven over that bridge, it was part of my daily commute for many years, but in the recent years I’ve only traveled over it a few times per month. I am so thankful that none of my friends or family members were on the bridge yesterday evening, but that isn’t allowing me to move on.

I am angry that there was prior evidence of fatigue stress on the bridge structure that wasn’t addressed. As a mechanical engineer I can’t help but go back to my statics and dynamics courses where I learned exactly what fatigue stress can do. I’m not ready to blame yet though, we don’t know enough. Nobody wanted this to happen, and I have to believe that if the bridge inspectors and engineers really felt it was a safety hazard it would have been fixed immediately regardless of budget constraints.

Mostly I just can’t get this image of me in my car, with my two kids strapped into their car seats behind me, as we plunge into the water out of my head. I know I have to stop thinking this way for my mental health, but there it is right now. What would I have done? Could I have saved both of my children? This immense feeling of dread has taken over my head today, and my thoughts are with everyone who has lost a loved one on the bridge, or is waiting for news about a missing family member or friend. I feel guilty for going about my normal routines today, guilty that my life hasn’t been directly affected, but also happy that it wasn’t us…and some more guilt for being so happy about that.

Edited to add a link to a pretty good editorial on the subject: Nick Coleman: Public anger will follow our Sorrow

Can I have one?

2007-08-01T10:33:00.000-05:00

Last night just before bedtime The Boy emerged from our bedroom holding something in his hand. He held it up to T and asked, “Can I have one?” T looked at it and said “no, you should really try to avoid touching those for the rest of your life.” The Boy was confused, I piped in to tell him that it was mine, and that it wasn’t candy. I walked away as T was telling him that it was a feminine hygiene product, I’m guessing there were more follow-up questions.

Just Beachy

2007-07-30T14:31:00.000-05:00

We had a fairly low-key weekend planned, so when The Boy started asking if we could go to the beach we decided we could swing such a trip. We decided to go on Sunday because by the time we thought about it on Saturday it had already slipped a little too close to nap time for our comfort. So Sunday morning we followed roughly our normal routine of me getting up with the kids, feeding them breakfast, and lounging around until I felt ready to go for my run. I ran my 7 miles, came home and showered, and the packing began.

What exactly do you need to pack for a less than 5 mile trip to a local lake? Good question. You need to pack much more than you would initially guess. You need to bring towels, sunscreen, swimsuits (which you change into at home), extra clothes for after swimming, sunglasses, and toys (which you raid from the sandbox and bathtub). You also need to pack a lunch so you don’t have to worry about the availability of concession stands at the lake. Beyond that you mostly just need to gather everybody into the car to head to the lake.

We arrived at the lake, staked out a spot on the beach (which turned out to be just a little too far from the water…we learned this only after the sun had sufficiently baked the sand and we had to walk back to our beach towels), slathered the kid in sunscreen, and found our way to the water. The kids had a fantastic time, so the $5 parking fee was well worth the expense.

The Boy qualitatively measures the viscosity of the wet sand

The Girl examines something in the sand

The Girl’s favorite lake activity (sitting in the water)

The Girl a little closer in to the camera

I am quite good at capturing The Boy not looking at the camera

The best part of the trip was that on our way home The Boy said, “can we go to the beach again another day?” When we got home he found a few toys that NEED to accompany us on the next trip to the beach as well. I’m glad we resisted the urge to just stay home yesterday; sometimes the memory building stuff is worth the hassle. I do have to take a moment to say that I didn’t wear sunscreen, and today my back hurts like mad. Apparently my farmer’s tan from running didn’t prepare my glaring white back for that much direct sun exposure. Ouch.

Four years old (plus a month or so)

2007-07-27T11:30:00.000-05:00

I apologize for taking so long to write this my incredible boy. You recently turned four, and you are a “big boy now.” You gave up your paci with very little fuss, you gave your “singing Mickey” to your little sister, you stopped wearing pull-ups to bed, and you stopped whining almost entirely (okay I made that last part up). Sometimes it feels like you have been in my life forever, and at other times I think you were surely my tiny baby just minutes ago. Watching you age and grow is one of my biggest joys. You are constantly learning, constantly questioning, and constantly challenging me (in a mostly good way). You are always finding new ways to entertain yourself, and the things your active imagination comes up with continue to astound me.

I am going to refrain from getting all sappy and doing a whole retrospective of the past four years, and no it isn’t because I am lazy (well not entirely). I’d like to focus on you right now, rather than what you have been in the past.

The Boy - 8 weeks old

Your favorite toys continue to be your cars, your trucks, your trains, and well basically anything with wheels. You develop elaborate scenarios for your cars, and you practically jump for joy when you can coerce your father and me into playing with you. I like to watch you playing; I like to overhear your conversations, because it gives me a window into how your mind works. I hope it takes a long time for you to move those conversations into your head, because I will truly miss them.

The Boy and I when he was tiny - ahhh

Your favorite food right now must be corn dogs. I have neglected to tell you that your favorite mini corn dogs are actually veggie dogs, and I don’t think I will share that tidbit of information with you for a very long time. It makes me feel slightly better that you aren’t getting a load of nitrates with each bite. You also continue to love broccoli just like I do, which is nice because now when I serve it for dinner there are two of us who will eat it. Perhaps you could convince your little sister that broccoli, and heck any other vegetable, is actually quite delicious because when I tell her she just isn’t buying it. You also love fruit in almost any form. I love that your eyes light up when I pull out the frozen grapes. Of course that isn’t to say that you don’t enjoy your share of sweets, but I prefer to focus on the healthy stuff for the purposes of this post.

Some early eating

Your favorite color is pink, but red is a close second. When asked you will say that red is your favorite color, but when it is time to choose a balloon color you always choose pink. I love that you haven’t bought into the boy/girl color schemes yet. I fear you will become corrupted as the years go by, but for now it is pretty cool that you like pink.

Notice the pink balloon

You love playing with water. Squirting the hose in the backyard has become a special little treat for you. You are good at watering big areas of dirt so that they become muddy; you are also great at watering the weeds that make up our backyard. Filling up the swimming pool gives you great pleasure; it is much more fun to fill it up slowly while taking breaks to water random things in the lawn than it is just to fill it up. When the pool is full you have no desire to get into it, but would rather dump the water out onto the grass using various buckets and watering cans. The joy on your face as you do this is incredible to see.

The Boy in his pool

Most of all you seem to love the attention of your parents in almost any form. You definitely let us know when we aren’t paying enough attention to you, and you do your best to correct that problem when it arises. I hope you never stop asking me for one more cuddle before bed, but I know that you will eventually. For now I will live in the moment without worrying about what you may do years from now. You truly are a gift, and I am honored that you want to spend so much time with me.

I love you!

I'm not cool enough to go to BlogHer

2007-07-25T20:28:00.000-05:00

For the past few weeks I have started to look at blogging as though it were junior high. I read some really fabulous blogs that so many other people also love as well. Blogs like Mom101, Suburban Turmoil, Chicky Chicky Baby, Motherhood Uncensored, and a bunch of others all fall into what I would call the stratosphere of "Mommy Blogs." I would liken them to the "popular girls" that I went to junior high with, of course they actually seem like nice people which is more than I can say about those junior high girls. I would love to believe that none of the women I've mentioned above ever kept logs of the clothing worn by their classmates (you know to mock them with when it was revealed that they wore the same outfit more than once in the span of a week...they would be horrified by how often I wear the same clothes now), or asked a non-popular boy to a dance only to back out by telling him that "I was only kidding, you are an outsider and I would never go out with you." Dreadful people those junior high girls.

I remember the first day of junior high like it was yesterday. I had a new pink outfit on, and the pink high heeled shoes that I though made me look so adult. As soon as I sat down for 7th grade orientation I knew I was not cool. The rules had changed in the span of one summer, and nobody gave me the memo. Cute was out, Guess jeans were in. I had never heard of Guess jeans, and my parents could not afford to help me rectify the situation. My clothing had dictated my place in the junior high social order. I found a nice group of friends in our lower social class, and became mostly content with my lot in life, but those popular girls were always there as a reminder that I wasn't good enough. They took every opportunity to remind us that we were less than them, and it worked. I can look back now and see that they were using their own insecurities to protect their places, but it was still shitty.

That social order has stayed with me at least somewhat throughout the rest of my life. High school was more tolerable than junior high was, but there was still a stratification of the cliques. I was part of the "nerd girl" clique, and that was fine by me, but it didn't stop me from wishing one of the jockish popular boys would ask me out. I went to college in my hometown, and was greeted there by the same jerks from junior high and high school who were under the assumption that this was a bigger high school. Thankfully I transferred to a different school for my junior and senior years where I got to start fresh. My first job after college had me falling into a similar kind of role. I did my work, didn't draw too much attention to myself, and stayed employed. Eventually though I started to grow tired of my lot in life, and I started exploring other opportunities. That feeling that I was less than stuck with me, and it has taken many years for me to know that I'm just selling myself short by allowing myself to feel that way. It really is a cop out, an excuse for not excelling at what I'm doing.

I am in no way inferring that all of the cool kids I mentioned in the first paragraph are like those junior high girls, only that I allow myself to feel like I am in a lower class. I had brief thoughts of planning a trip to BlogHer, but I couldn't talk my buddy PDX Mama into it so I stopped thinking about it. Unless I had someone to help me screw up my courage I just didn't think I could do it. Now, I'm a little bit mad at myself for not just following through and going. I hope you all have fun, perhaps next year I will get over my hangups and just join you already.

Ideas wanted

2007-07-24T13:11:00.000-05:00

So I may have mentioned before that I was given the opportunity to do something different for work. I told you to email me to find out what it was, and well, nobody did…guess I know where I rate! Anyway, it turns out that the different thing isn’t as easy to launch as I thought it would be, mostly because actual work keeps getting in the way and I find I have very little time for it. Another road block is that it is really hard to come up with ideas for a work related blog. There I’ve said it; my idea was to launch a work blog to help us filter more people to our actual website. I had lots of great ideas in the plan I pitched to my boss, but have I mentioned that it is hard? The goal is really only to start generating a buzz about what we do, and since we are a tiny company our advertising budget is almost non-existent. My thought was that I enjoy blogging as a hobby (can I call it that?), so why not extend it into the realm of work. Can you say naïve?

I’m really struggling with a way to just give you a link to the other blog (perhaps if you googled the words in the picture above you might be able to find it), but I still have this insane idea that my blog is a private thing and that my coworkers know nothing about it. The fact that I’ve shown several of them my house remodeling photos from this blog doesn’t even wave this belief. So should I just give you the link? I mean attracting a bunch of my friends to my work blog isn’t exactly my intent, but I do want to drive traffic to the site. I am supposed to present my idea to the entire company at our annual meeting next month, and it would be nice to show that we have had more than 4 visits to the site by then. Do any of you have any experience with a professional blog? Do you have any ideas about ways to drive quality traffic to my other blog that you would be willing to share?

Oh I'd never let MY kids do that...

2007-07-15T14:26:00.000-05:00

Okay fess up. What horrible things do you allow your kids to do, that in your pre-kid days you swore up and down that you would never allow? For me it has to be the huge bins filled with toys. I remember going to friends' houses who had kids and being absolutely disgusted by the vast quantity of cheap crappy toys that resided in the toy bins. I remember telling T that "we won't get happy meal toys for our kids, because there is no need to have all of those stupid little crappy toys all over the place." Ha!

Well we don't get happy meals for our kids, actually we only very rarely eat fast food as a family (I'm fairly sure that T on occasion eats fast food for lunch), but we do have vast quantities of little crappy toys scattered all throughout our house. We have two Rubbermaid bins full, we have a little car shaped storage bin device in The Boy's room, and we have an entire series of bins in The Girl's room all filled with crap. Oh, some of it isn't really crap, but the net effect in the house is that it looks like we never weed through our children's toys (which admittedly we don't do all that often). Turns out it is easier to have bins filled with crap if you want to be able to see your floors on occasion.

So what is your biggest back-track parenting wise? I'm tagging a few of my friends just to see if they will play along. Tell me PDX Mama, Christine, Kate, Jennifer, Lawyer Mama, and whomever else wants to play along, have you let your houses become disorganized toy stores too? If not, what do you do that you told yourself you would never do?

When I get a moment I will add pictures to this post, although I'd guess you can all pretty easily get a mental picture of the toy craziness.

Overheard

2007-07-10T10:57:00.000-05:00

Sometimes we accidentally on purpose don’t turn on the baby monitor, but other times we really do just forget to turn it on. One night last week such a thing occurred, and when we realized our mistake we heard the following exchange (the kids were supposed to be sleeping and they do not share a room):

The Boy: *The Girl’s name* *The Girl’s name* look at this picture
The Girl: A baby
The Boy: It’s me!
The Boy: That is me as a baby, look Mommy is holding me
The Girl: My mommy!
The Boy: No, she is both of our Mommy
The Boy: This is Arizona Grandma holding me when I was a baby, and Arizona Grandpa
The Girl: Where’s me?
The Boy: Look, I’m growing up in this picture
The Girl: but where’s me?
The Boy: Daddy is holding me when I was a baby
The Girl: Where’s me?

DH and I have a little discussion and decide that The Boy is showing The Girl the photo album my Mom (Arizona Grandma) gave The Boy for Christmas a few years back. It is filled with pictures of The Boy as a baby, and as a one-year-old, pictures with his Arizona Grandparents and pictures of DH and me. We decide we need to break up this little interlude before The Girl realizes that we have very few pictures of her in albums.

I arrive upstairs and as The Boy hears me walking up the stairs he quickly shuffles back into his own room. I was just helping *The Girl’s name*, he tells me. Helping her do what, I question? I was just helping her. Okay. The scene in The Girl’s room is comical; all of the toys from her storage bins are either in her crib or on the floor just outside of her crib. Presumably The Boy had been helping her gather all of her toys as she directed him from inside her crib. We all giggle a little, clean up, and bed time is enforced. While we certainly don’t want to encourage these little events, I still get a smile on my face when I think about it. Sometimes I could just eat them up. They are so sweet when they aren’t whining or torturing each other.

New batteries please

2007-07-09T20:51:00.000-05:00

The Fisher Price Aquarium (I had a picture of it here), get your minds out of the gutter! I'm sitting here listening to the horrid sound of the FP crib aquarium through the muffled sound of the baby monitor, and it is making me cringe. Eventually the monitor will declare the aquarium chirps and bubbles to be "background noise" and it will go back to quiet, but for now I'm stuck listening to the wacky sound of the aquarium when it is low on batteries. Funny that is just gets slow then speeds up again, almost like you are playing with the speed setting on a turntable...do people still remember those?

4 D batteries lie in wait, but we can't disturb the evening routine once it has begun...perhaps tomorrow night she will have an aquarium that actually emits some light and has recognizable tunes, but for now we suffer.

I swear that aquarium was the best baby gift we registered for and received...if only they made a plug in version so we didn't have to keep paying it with batteries. FP Aquarium = baby crack = toddler crack = preschoolers just like to turn it on and off again repeatedly when they somehow manage to climb into their little sisters' cribs.

Vacation

2007-07-08T20:15:00.000-05:00

T and I had the bulk of last week off from work. Our kids' daycare was closed for the week so we took the opportunity to have a week off as a family. We didn't plan much, so the week ended up being a hodge-podge of activity. I have to be honest here and say that dropping them off at daycare this morning was perhaps the highlight of the past week. I love them so much, but they absolutely exhaust me.

How is it that I can long to be with them when I am working, but when I am with them want nothing more than to run away? Of course there are plenty of happy times scattered in there, but then The Boy won't nap for a solid week and my sense of balance is thrown out of whack. All I can think about is the lack of naps, and how cranky and whiny my children are.

It was a nice feeling to pick them up this evening though. I did miss them while I was at work, but the break from them was very much needed. So there you have it...I am a crappy crappy Mom who likes being away from her children.

Remodel: Week 9

2007-07-04T07:20:00.000-05:00

I just finished my morning workout, and everyone else is still asleep so I thought I would use this opportunity to post the latest remodel pictures. Word has it that they will be done next week! I plan to post the before and after pictures when it is completely done, but if you are itching to see what it was like before, just click here.

Some kitchen views, with a little help from The Girl:

The Bathroom (the grout was sealed yesterday so we aren’t allowed to walk on the floor)

The dining room

A break to pick her nose

The new slide in dual fuel range

So there you have it, some minor details remain, and carpet for the living room and office will go a long way to making it feel done I’m sure.

A Sunday in Pictures

2007-07-02T08:52:00.000-05:00

I just uploaded pictures from our digital camera, and realized that all of the pictures were taken yesterday. The pictures give the illusion that we had a really fun day, so I thought I would use this opportunity to tell you about it.

A little snack to curb some early afternoon fussies, yes that is highly processed cheese like product:

Hanging out in the swimming pool in our backyard…you’ll notice neither kid is all that interested in getting inside of the swimming pool. They do love taking all of the water out of the pool and spreading it all around the yard though.

After an attempt at nap from some and an actual nap from others we decided to walk over to the Japanese Garden…a great free escape for us, less than a mile from our house:

I tried my best to get a picture with all 3 of my loves looking at the camera, but you take what you can get

The Girl looking blissful as she runs away from us and back to us over and over again

Some scenery

And some wildlife

A killer goose

Fish and geese swarming when a nice group of twenty something girls gave us a piece of bread to feed them with

And more scenery

And one last attempt at a picture of my three

Too bad I didn’t get a picture of The Boy making me carry him for the last few blocks home. We had a good time, but the mile plus of walking definitely took its toll on him. The Girl was in the jogging stroller begging to walk.

Remodling isn't all bad

2007-07-01T13:47:00.000-05:00

We've been without a kitchen for 8 weeks now. You would think we would be going absolutely crazy, but I've got to say that we aren't. In fact, at the family reunion we attended yesterday I found myself telling other people how it was actually kind of nice not to have to do dishes. *gasp* Not only are we using all paper plates, but we have paper bowls, paper/plastic cups, and plastic utensils. Oh sure we have a wet bar sink to wash things in, and sometimes we have to use an avoidable reusable dish, but we can't even be bothered to wash silverware. We have taken this lack of kitchen thing to the extreme. I did breakdown and buy the "Earthware" paper plates the other day because the waste we are producing was starting to get to me a bit though.

Another unintended benefit is that you can't hear the kids screaming on the second floor if you hunker down in the office in the basement. Oh, of course we do have a baby monitor for such occasions, but what fun is it to hide in the office if you can hear the kids screaming? This way I can pretend that they are sleeping. Not that I am doing that right now or anything...

The bad part of this plan is that The Boy can get out of bed on his own and will wander around the house looking for me. He has also figured out that if he goes into The Girl's room and talks "to her" we can hear him on the monitor (assuming it is on). This of course makes The Girl scream, but at least we can't hear it.

Soon enough we will be back to living on the main floor, where it is almost impossible to avoid the screaming sounds that filter down from the second floor. At least we had a short reprieve.

Remodel: week 8

2007-06-27T20:24:00.000-05:00

We are inching towards the two month mark with the big remodel. I won’t waste your time with a bunch of words, so without further ado here are some progress pictures:

The new hardwood floor

Dining room into the kitchen

Kitchen into dining room

The beginnings of a railing to make the basement stairs entrance a little safer

The new roll-in shower

Just a tiny curb to keep the water contained

Another kitchen view

Oh, and the basically complete playset

Countertops next week, electrical tomorrow…perhaps I can take some better pictures when we have lights again!

Bumper Sticker of the Day

2007-06-26T09:07:00.000-05:00

Jesus Loves You.
Everybody else thinks you are an asshole.

Thank you Black Ford F150 for brightening my morning just a bit.

My weekend of P

2007-06-25T10:49:00.000-05:00

I owe my darling boy a birthday tribute post, but I want to add pictures so it needs to wait for a few days. Instead I wanted to fill you in on my weekend of P.

The First P
The weekend started a little early as I left work a bit early to come home to help T Paint. Our contractor was itching to start installing the new trim throughout the main floor, and we wanted to get all of the walls painted before that happened. This resulted in a mad scramble to prime and paint all of the walls. The paint perfectionist himself even allowed me to paint, rolling no less, because he was too tired to do it all on his own. I wasn’t even the one to put a big roller mark of paint on the ceiling either, no I just managed to hit at least 5 edges of taped off trim. Still the finished result looks pretty darn good if I do say so myself. I’m sure it will look even better with trim up. We owe a great deal of thanks to T’s little brother T, and our Nephew for assisting with some taping and wall prep on Saturday. We also owe Buzz and Woody and Lightning McQueen a great deal of thanks for babysitting the kids for us.

The Second P
Not to be accused of living a sedentary life we also managed to throw a nice little birthday Party for The Boy on Saturday morning. The day started early, as I squeezed in a run, and then T made the playset suitable for the group of 3 year olds who would arrive at our house at 11 AM. This involved mounting the swings on the set. I set to work decorating and hiding the plastic bugs the kids were to find around the yard, and when we realized how squeezed for time we were we called in some reinforcements…sending T’s parents on a side trip to buy balloons. The guests soon arrived, the kids found their bugs, played on the playset, did a little craft, ate pizza, fruit, gummy worms, and finally some cake. After the little guests had departed we watched The Boy open his presents, the highlights being a bug/frog habitat (hey we can send away for a free tadpole!) and a remote control dinosaur that scares The Girl enough that we had to hide it with the other electronic dinosaur he got from my parents!

The Third P
After the party we went right back to painting, but if we fast forward to the end of the painting Sunday evening, there was a bit more work on the Playset. We managed to get the beginnings of the roof on the set, and finally rid ourselves of the last cardboard box of parts! We are in the home stretch now. I promise to post pictures of the completed set when we get there. Our stamina was running very low at this point though after a long day of painting so we called it quits pretty quickly.

The Fourth P
The scene, the kids’ bathroom, the crime: Poop in the tub. Enough said.

The Fifth P
The scene, the kids’ bathroom, the crime: a Potty accident all over the floor.

I was so very happy to come to work today to get a little bit of a break. I’m all P’d out!

Oh, I'm supposed to be opposed to this

2007-06-19T21:28:00.000-05:00

I got an annoying forwarded email from one of our neighborhood watch block captains the other day. I normally would have just deleted it without a second thought, but somewhere in the first few lines was the mention of Super Target. I was intrigued. Of course the gist of the email was that we were supposed to be opposed to this monstrosity that could perhaps one day be built 2.5 miles from our homes. Of course there already is a Target about 3-4 miles from our homes, but it isn't Super. It is just your standard old Target. The problem with the proposed site it seems is that the only access roads are already congested, and more traffic to the area would not be appreciated. I tried to be indignant. I tried to be against it, but I just can't. I love Target, and the thought of a Target that is running distance from my house is almost too good to be true.

So should I go to the community feedback meeting to rally for the city to rezone the area to retail? I don't drive that way all that often anyway, so it isn't like it would affect me daily. Right, right, I'm supposed to be opposed to this proposal. I mean we have a Target 4 miles to our North, and one 9 or so miles to our South, another 6 miles to the North, and well lots more to the east and west. We aren't lacking any Targets, and two of those I just detailed are currently closed as they transform to Super Targets. Do we really need more Targets? What is the ideal number of Target stores per square mile anyway? We are very under-Walmarted in our metro area, I think Target is just trying to keep it that way. I would certainly rather have a new Target than a new Walmart.

Maybe I'll just forward the email to a few other people and forget all about it. Yes, that is more likely, or just delete it without forwarding. Case closed.

Remodel: What, is this week 6?

2007-06-14T16:42:00.000-05:00

Oh, you knew it would happen, you knew I started out with remodel day one, remodel day two, then would jump to day 8, then day 20 didn’t you? Now it has been more than a week since I last shared any house progress. Part of that is just being insanely busy with work and at home, but the other part is that there just wasn’t much to say. We’d come home each day and the house would look more or less the same as when we’d left that morning. Not too exciting to blog about, so I’ve spared you the details. Things are getting interesting around here now though, so for your viewing pleasure I give you:

Drywall and hardwood flooring

Coming up from the basement

From the living room into the kitchen

From the dining room into the kitchen

The new sliding glass door off of the dining room

Looking at the basement stairs...behold flooring!

Just one random picture of the stucco work (that is now done, so the scaffolding is gone, but well I’m too lazy to go out in the heat to take a new picture)

Oh, and because we didn’t have enough work to do we thought we would tackle building the Costco Sunray playset in time for The Boy’s birthday party next weekend. Surely T can fit that in along with painting the entire main floor of the house right?

The ground is not so level around here:

But the extra dirt is great for building “mountains”

A run in the day

2007-06-12T09:22:00.000-05:00

Morning was just a little smoother today…

Rather than bore you with my pre-run ~~torture~~ schedule, I thought I would share with you my Tuesday morning run.

My runs all begin basically the same way: Out the door to set T’s Garmin GPS watch outside (finish getting ready inside while the GPS finds its satellites), then back out the door, ready to run, put the watch on walk down the driveway, start running.

Quiet morning today, I don’t see anybody outside until just before I get to my first major road crossing. Ah, but there she is, another runner. She passes less than 20 seconds before I reach the intersection. She is running on the other side of the street (she is running with traffic, where I will cross and run against traffic…more practically I’ll be running on the side of the road with the asphalt bike path while she is running on the side with concrete sidewalks – ouch her knees!). As I cross the street I notice another runner coming up the road I’m about to turn onto, she must not pass me. Oh, but she turns off onto the other street, no need to worry about her passing me. I decide I have to keep the other girl in my sights. She looks strong and also like she is moving at a nice clip. Oh, what’s this, there is a guy out walking, he’s wearing black shorts and a white t-shirt, I must pass him. Oh, but he turned off onto a side street; I won’t be able to pass him because I am continuing on. I’m impressed with myself as we reach the next major intersection, fast girl and I peel off in opposite directions on the same road at basically the same time. I was impressed with her pace, but then I was keeping it too, go me! Oh, look another runner going the other way, lots of runners out today. Garmin chirps at me, one mile down 9:19. Not bad I guess, though it certainly felt like I was running faster than that.

Now up the hill. Man do I hate this hill. Why do I insist on taking this route so often? Surely I could find a better route with fewer hills, oh that’s right but then I have to contend with the killer geese. I guess I’ll take my chances with the hills. Stupid hill, my legs hurt. I want to walk; surely walking just a little stretch wouldn’t be so bad. No walking. Right right, no walking, I’ll just run up the hill, I mean the worst part of the hill is only ½ mile long, then it has a few flats in it. I’ve run it many times before, stop whining. Look there is a woman out walking her dog, we should get a dog, I miss our dog. Stupid legs, my quads hurt, I should just walk a little. No walking. Ahhh a flat, that wasn’t so bad, was it? Yes it was, my legs still hurt, and there is still more hill left. I should look at my watch, no I won’t look at my watch until it chirps at me after this mile is done. More hill, but just a little more before we reach the shopping center complex, then there is the big downhill, almost there. Chirp, 10:40. 10:40??? How is that possible? I didn’t walk at all! I did it in 10:40 on Sunday and I walked twice, I didn’t feel like I slowed down that much today. Stupid hill, maybe my GPS lost its signal and I really ran it faster than that. Oh right, but it chirped at me at the exact same point it always chirps at me for mile 2, probably not a GPS error. Crap I’m slow.

Well at least I’m running downhill now. Look a minivan just pulled out of the underground garage in that apartment complex, I wonder if they like living in those apartments. I probably wouldn’t like living there since this street is so busy, but then we have a house so why do I care? Crap, there are geese on the side of the path ahead. There are 3 big geese and a ton of baby geese, they are so totally going to hiss at me and try to attack me. Damn this road is busy; I can’t even run in the road. I’m going to stop and cross the street to run past those stupid geese. Crisis averted, ran in the median for a while to get past the geese. After the near miss with the geese on the other route a few weeks back I just can’t be too careful, that was scary! I swear that goose was going to peck my legs. Okay onto the final stretch, just 1.5 miles from home. That’s just 6 laps on the treadmill; I can do that in my sleep. Why do I equate outside distance to laps on the treadmill anyway? That is weird. The nice little senior coop housing complex has its sprinklers on. Why do they insist on watering the sidewalks? I’m just going to run in the street to get past them. I don’t like running in sprinklers, even if I am hot. Another sprinkler on the sidewalk ahead, this is just so wasteful. How difficult is it to aim your sprinklers so that they don’t water the sidewalks? Chirp, 9:39. Well at least I am sub 10:00 pace again.

Just 4 laps left, and look I can start playing alphabet games with the street signs. This street name starts with L, the next street I cross starts with J. Oh, I’m already to I, then H, then G, look I’m all the way to F, and I get to hit the crosswalk button so I can rest for a minute before going across. Well that was a buzz kill, no wait, must keep running. Look two more runners out, I guess everyone is out running early to try to beat the heat and humidity. Is that the same guy out walking? What is he just walking tiny little laps around the area? I suppose it could be someone else in black shorts and a white t-shirt, not exactly a unique outfit choice. I mean I’m wearing black shorts and a purple shirt, but then this purple shirt has those stupid micro sleeves that flip out. Duck pond, almost home. I should just walk, I’m almost home, stop talking about walking, just suck it up and run the last 0.3 miles. I’ll just run around the next two corners and then I’ll walk, or maybe I’ll just run. Oh it’s a little dog ahead, I think he is threatened by me, yes he is barking at me, ah but now he is turning away and running back home, not so brave after all. Scrubs-wearing guy is out watering his immaculate lawn, and he ferries scrappy little dog away from me. I wonder if scrubs-wearing guy is a doctor. Do doctors wear scrubs other than when they are in the hospital? Look I’m almost home, seeing a neighbor out always stops me from walking. Home. No chirp, still need another 0.1 miles to make it an even 4. Should I bother? Nope. I’m done, at least I didn’t walk. 38:03 for 3.9 miles, not a speed record for me by any means but not too bad for a Tuesday morning.
Now the real work begins, getting the kids up, dressed, fed, and out the door. I suppose I should take a shower first.

Alarm clock

2007-06-11T13:53:00.000-05:00

2:43 AM – loud screams heard from The Girl’s room
2:44 AM – decide T isn’t going to get up in time to stop The Girl from waking up The Boy, so I go get her from her ~~prison~~ crib
2:45 AM – settle back into bed and fall asleep (The Girl close beside me)
Unknown too BF early time – Wake to the feeling of someone breathing on my face
Still unknown too BF early time – Pretend I don’t feel the breathing that is coming from the edge of the bed where no person should be standing
4:29 AM – Tell The Boy to just climb up in bed already
4:30 AM – fall back asleep
5:29 AM – wake up for no apparent reason
5:29:55 AM – turn off alarm clock so as not to wake the two sleeping children to my left
5:33 AM – Wake to T’s alarm clock
5:34 AM – get out of bed and head to the bathroom to change into running clothes
5:35 AM – Emerge from bathroom to find The Girl is missing from the bed
5:35:01 AM – Find The Girl trying to affix the toilet insert seat onto the toilet (seat left up by The Boy)
5:35:45 AM – Listen to The Girl tell me “My need go toy-et”
5:36 AM – Change The Girl’s diaper
5:37 AM – Briefly consider just forgetting my run and sleeping in with the kids
5:37:22 AM – The Boy wakes up, and both children start whining at the prospect of me leaving for a run
5:38 AM – Turn on Disney Channel, shut the gate at the top of stairs, and leave for my run, T will wake up eventually

To delay or not to delay that is the question

2007-06-07T08:12:00.000-05:00

The Boy is quickly approaching his fourth birthday. We have been busy with party planning, and dealing with constant questions from him on the order of “will it be my birthday after nap?” No, honey your birthday is still more than two weeks away, we answer. Blank stare from him follows, and as you can practically see the wheels turning in his head he comes back with “why is my birthday two weeks away?” I know he is having trouble dealing with delayed gratification here, he’s been privy to perhaps too much of the party planning (we are having a bug party, and he is very excited about this prospect), and knows we have a stash of plastic bugs hidden away. It is very hard to explain the concept of two weeks to my nearly four year old. He has started to grasp the idea of what tomorrow means, but he isn’t quite there yet. He says things like “will it be tomorrow when I wake up from nap?” In his mind nap during the day vs. sleeping at night equates to the same thing, but to be clear for your sake he does mean sleeping at night. We answer that yes it will be tomorrow when you wake up from sleeping tonight, but…then it will be today. You can see why he thinks we are playing mind games with him.

In instances like this I find it impossible to believe that he will start preschool in the fall, and that technically he should start Kindergarten in a year and a few months. I mean certainly he needs to grasp the concept of time a little better before Kindergarten right? He is bright, inquisitive, energetic, and just wonderful to be around. Why is it that I am forced to look at his not so perfect qualities as I decide whether or not he will start kindergarten “on time?” I actually hate that it is even a question. As the parents of a boy with a June birthday, we have been told many times that we should really plan on him starting Kindergarten at six rather than at five. The rationale is based on the fact that they are shoving so much academic learning down into Kindergarten now, that young five year olds are at a huge disadvantage which will carry along with them for the rest of school. The cutoff in our state is September 1st, and it is a hard cutoff, no leeway to let a child with a September 2nd birthday start school early.

I’m not really opposed to starting The Boy later than his age dictates, but the whole idea drives T crazy. He will rail that if we are holding June birthdays back eventually it will be May, then April, etc., where do we draw the line? He will claim that unless there is a real reason to delay people should be forced to enroll their kids when they meet the age requirements, because frankly the schools are only getting around all of this No Child Left Behind garbage by forcing what used to be the first grade curriculum into kindergarten. Of course it is easier for teachers to teach a first grade curriculum to kids who are six at the beginning of the year (you know first graders!), kids who in many cases have had an extra year of preschool to prepare them for kindergarten. T says that we need to push back so schools can’t keep shoving more and more into kindergarten, but then who wants their June birthday boy to be a test case for how the school system failed them? In theory it is a good idea, but come on am I really going to play games with my child’s future?

I just read an article in the New York Times magazine titled: When Should a Kid Start Kindergarten?, where this topic was discussed in great detail. I am most struck by the quote from a mom who did start her child who just made the deadline:

“I kick myself every year now that we sent her ahead.”

Yes, this is what T and I will struggle with when we make the decision for our boy. Not, is he ready now, or is this the morally right thing to do, but will we watch our boy struggle through school and kick ourselves because we let him start Kindergarten on time. For now the decision remains on the back burner. We’ve decided to revisit the topic with his preschool teacher so we can make more of an informed decision. We still have lots of time to mull it over, and there is no point in agonizing about it now. I’m sure by the time he is five The Boy will know all too well what it means to delay his birthday party for an entire week so his grandparents can attend the party. How do I explain that to him now though?

Caution: May cause shrinkage

2007-06-05T10:12:00.000-05:00

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the size of my chest. I never used to care all that much that I wasn’t well endowed, but after breastfeeding The Girl I started to care. I certainly don’t regret the fact that I breastfed her for fifteen months, in fact I’m quite proud of it. After my failure to breastfeed The Boy it felt like a minor victory to be able to feed her sans pump for so long. It may have been a tad ironic when she absolutely refused bottles for a good stretch, but we struggled through. What I didn’t realize is that by pumping for The Boy and breastfeeding The Girl my breast tissue would somehow escape from my breasts along with the milk. Nobody tells you this will happen, and physiologically I’m not entirely sure that it is possible, but where there used to be B cups there are now just sad little A cups. I used to laugh at padded bras, now they are my mainstay.

Oh I know many of you have large breasts, so large that you cannot possibly understand what I am talking about. You pee on a stick, get a positive, and two minutes later you have grown from a D cup to an F cup or some such thing. I’ve read about it happening, and read the complaints about it happening, and just nodded quietly. I don’t understand what you are going through. You bemoan the fact that you can’t find pretty bras in your size well wah, have you ever looked to see what the selection is like for us A cup gals? I got positive pregnancy tests and never once had the sore breasts you read you might have as a symptom. My breasts stayed exactly the same size until my milk came in each time. Oh, I suppose there was some rib spreading that may have affected my band size, but the cup size never flinched. Even with my milk in I wasn’t that big, a full B cup, maybe a small C cup when fully engorged. Of course when I weaned I wasn’t expecting miracles, but I was expecting to go back to my normal size. No such luck, both times I quickly deflated to A cup size, and after The Girl I had to give up on my B cup bras because they looked silly all dimpled and sad.

I realize that there are much more important things to worry about in this world, but for the first time in my life I feel like I actually want to have something done about this. After I am 100% sure we are done having kids I plan to have small implants added, under the muscle. I’m not hoping to get that large, just enough so that I am not embarrassed to wear a tight fitting t-shirt. I’d like to feel like a woman again. I suppose this makes me shallow, or vain, or some combination thereof, but I don’t care.

Several years ago T and I, and another couple were bowling at a loud club like bowling alley. I was at the lowest weight I’ve ever been, wearing a nice form fitting turtleneck sweater, and jeans. I was pretty happy about my appearance. Then something strange happened. A random guy came and sat next to me in the bowling alley lane seating (which frankly is weird in and of itself), while T was up bowling his turn. The guy leaned over and said something along the lines of “you have the smallest tits in the world.” I just gave him a death stare and got up to bowl. The guy eventually left our area and went on to bother other people. I didn’t say anything to T because I didn’t want him to cause a scene, but as we left the bowling alley I told T and the other couple we were with what the idiot had said to me. They were all livid on my behalf, and came up with oodles of good comebacks I could have used, things like “well you should know since you have the smallest penis on the planet.” We moved on and honestly it didn’t bother me that much, but now I feel like saying you ain’t seen nothing yet, because they are in fact smaller now then they were then. I still wonder if that was just the world’s worst pickup line or if the guy was just an asshole.

I don’t want you to get the mistaken impression that the idiot in the bowling alley was the precipice for this thought, because he wasn’t. T wasn’t the instigator either, I mean T certainly isn’t opposed to the idea, but you know loves me the way that I am and all. It was only recently when I read about someone else having the procedure done that I started to think more seriously about it. I need to give it more thought, do some more research, and confirm that given my family history of breast cancer (My Mom and her Mom) that it wouldn’t impede routine exams and such. Of course if my current breasts managed to get breast cancer it would be like some cruel little joke, I can’t imagine what I’d be left with after a lumpectomy.

I’ve decided that we should warn other women about the dangerous effects of breastfeeding. If formula has to have a warning label on it telling women that it is inferior to breastmilk, breastfeeding supplies and literature should have to tell women that breastfeeding could in fact cause their breasts to shrivel down a size or two. Something like Caution: Breastfeeding my cause breast shrinkage. It is only fair right? Of course I’m sure some breastfeeding advocates would slam me for saying that, just like they slam people who say that breastfeeding hurts like a mofo in the beginning even if you are doing it right (yes The Girl’s latch was ‘perfect’ and yet I still had bleeding raw nips for several weeks, having to wince through the beginning of each and every nursing session and take 600 mg of Ibuprofen every 4-6 hours to cope). We are supposed to live in bliss knowing that any sacrifice in breast size and any temporary pain is all a gift to our children. Whatever. If we ever lose our minds and have a third child I will breastfeed again, but I’m now under no illusions that it is all magical and wonderful. I’ll probably be a “nearly A” cup by the time I finished nursing another. Lactivist? Not so much.

Status Report

2007-06-04T10:39:00.000-05:00

As you may or may not know I have been making little tweaks to my life this year. I decided that it was time for an update, so here it goes. My newest life change has been the shift of my obsessive compulsive running habit from after work to early morning. I now wake up at 5:30 AM most weekdays to run or do some other form of exercise (an exercise video which shall remain nameless because frankly I don’t think it deserves any more attention, has found its way into my routine once or twice a week now). Those first few weeks of waking up nearly an hour earlier than normal were brutal. I had to drag my butt out of bed each and every day, and I kept wondering why I was torturing myself. Now, while I can’t say it is easy to get out of bed in the morning, my body has adjusted and I actually wake up before my alarm goes off most days. I can run up to 5 miles or so before my late return starts to impact T’s morning routine. I’ve been getting up early now for perhaps six weeks, I guess that means it has become my new normal.

Having my run/workout out of the way early in the morning has given me more flexibility in my schedule. I no longer have to scheme ways to fit in my run after work, and I can actually pick up the kids at daycare if I so choose. I’m still getting to work at close to 8 AM, but I am sacrificing an hour of sleep. I know my body has adjusted, but my eyes are bloodshot nearly every day. I don’t think I’m getting enough sleep, but going to bed at 9:30 PM isn’t appealing to me. For now I’ve decided that the pros of getting up early outweigh the cons, we’ll see how I feel in the dead of winter when it is bitch black outside at 5:30 AM.

My other big news is that I approached my boss with an idea that will help me fill in some of the downtime I occasionally have at work. While, it doesn’t seem as though there will be much downtime for the balance of the summer, I was given the go ahead for my plan. I’m excited by the challenge, and hopeful that it will bring good results for the company. Mostly, I’m thrilled that I took the time to put myself out there, rather than just staying with the status quo that was making me miserable. I’m not going to post the specifics about what I’ll be doing because I’m still under the illusion that this blog is not known about at work. While I’ve never said anything derogative, my little online journal isn’t exactly what I want my boss to read. If you want more details, feel free to email me…I keep meaning to set up an email link here and perhaps this will spur me to actually do so.

Baby steps really do get you where you want to go if you have a little patience and a lot of persistence.

Remodel: Day 20

2007-06-02T08:46:00.001-05:00

Days are counted as actual contractor working days since the project began. Perhaps this is confusing for you since it is for me (technically it would be day 19 since there was a holiday on Monday). It has been 4 solid working weeks for our contractors, or nearly a month. I haven't updated lately because honestly it basically looks the same as it did when I last posted on day 8. Okay that isn't entirely true, some HVAC vents have been moved, some plumbing perhaps has been moved, oh and we did get the new windows installed and the new wonderful 3-panel sliding glass door. A big milestone occurred yesterday though, our new drywall was delivered. Just as The kids and I were leaving for daycare/work, the huge flatbed truck with A CRANE MOMMY!, parked in front of our driveway (blocking me in). They graciously moved so I could get out of the driveway after I learned that said delivery would take nearly an hour. Of course the drywall wasn't put up yesterday, but we can see the nice neat stacks up against our walls just waiting to be installed. I foresee new exciting pictures to share in the early part of next week.

Let's talk about...laundry?

2007-05-24T09:10:00.000-05:00

After my tribute post to my darling daughter I’ve been having a hard time coming up with something to write about. Rather than search for something profound or even remotely interesting I’m just going to write about laundry. Or more correctly, I’m going to write about my laundry problem. Perhaps I have mentioned before that I am a little obsessive compulsive when it comes to laundry. Can you be a little obsessive compulsive? No, I suppose you can’t be. Anyway, it isn’t that I require my shirts to be washed on the sanitary cycle or heck even my underwear (the sanitary cycle takes like an hour and 40 minutes and that would severely cut into my ability to finish the chore), but I do have to finish my laundry on Sunday. There is some slack in when the laundry is started. If I know Sunday will be a busy day, I will occasionally start a load of laundry on Saturday evening, but otherwise it starts and finishes on Sunday. There is something about having a laundry day that just appeals to me. Ever since I’ve lived on my own I have done laundry on a set day of the week. Going to bed Sunday night, knowing that all of my clothes are clean and ready for the week just feels good. This likely stemmed from the fact that I used to only have enough clothes to last me through one week, so that was about as long as I could put it off. Eventually it became a habit.

Now that there are two kids in our house, the weekly laundry has grown from 3-4 loads to 6-7 loads, 8 if someone barfs/poops/pees on clothing/bedding/towels (and mid-week laundry exceptions are sometimes made when the aforementioned bodily fluids make their way onto washable fabrics). I don’t claim to be a laundry genius, but I hold my own. I’m a whiz with the shout gel stick, and have an eagle eye at spotting stains that need to be slathered with it before the wash cycle. However, I’ve been a little lax lately about pre-treating stains the same day they were incurred. This means that sometimes The Girl’s ultra sloppy tendencies come back to bite me in the behind. The Boy can be sloppy too, but for some reason his clothes usually manage to emerge from the washing machine stain free. Not so for The Girl’s clothing. In the past two weeks we have suffered the untimely demise of five of her shirts. Three of her lost shirts were from Target, ranging in price from $3.99 to $4.99, so no huge loss. One was a hand-me-down shirt from a good local friend of mine…an Old Navy shirt, that I’m afraid won’t live to be handed down again, and finally there is the ultra cute shirt I actually paid a fair amount of money for at Nordstroms. It has a cute butterfly on it, and it matches a great pair of leggings. Ah well, she can still wear it I guess, it just won’t look nice anymore.

If you have any stain fighting tips I’m all ears. The 5 shirts have not yet been dried, so technically the stains aren’t “set,” but I fear that I have already exhausted my hopes. I have however washed all of them with a wide variety of pre-treaters, soaked them in a bucket full of water and Oxy Clean for several hours, sprayed them with pre-treater for “set in” stains, and rubbed powdered Oxy clean on top of the pre-treater, let them sit like that overnight, and rewashed them. All to no avail, the shirts still have big blotches of dirt/food/whatever all over them. I am considering the unthinkable of just soaking them in water and regular chlorine bleach and living with the color changes that ensue. At least if they are bleached they won’t look blotchy right? If that doesn’t work, at least she has a great stash of back up clothes for daycare (when she spills more food/dirt/whatever on herself).

I'm open to any ideas you might have.

Another year older

2007-05-20T16:27:00.000-05:00

Two years ago today I was holding you for the very first time. You kept us all guessing as to when you would arrive, and only after a scheduled induction for the next day did you decide it was time. You might have been a week overdue, and you might have cried for most of your first 3-4 months of life, but you are worth all of it. You have changed so much over the past two years. I look at you, and you are no longer that dark haired little girl who's head I spent hours staring at (and picking away the cradle cap from) while you nursed.

This little squimy newborn who wasn't quite ready for the world after 41 weeks minus two or so in the womb. No, now you are ready for any adventure. Ready to run, climb, jump, whatever your big brother is doing you surely aren't far behind.

It is a gift to get to watch you grow and change as each day passes. Your first birthday wasn't so long ago, but yet you are completely changed from then as well. You are becoming less baby and more big girl with each new month.

Happy Birthday, my amazing girl, you seem to have enjoyed your party

and your cake

and all of your loot

I love you, more than you can ever know.

Remodel: Day 8

2007-05-17T11:11:00.000-05:00

I know you don’t really want to read about the remodel, you want to see pictures. I will come back to add pictures to this post when I get around to downloading them from our camera. You will just have to wait.

Significant progress this week is the installation of the new steel beam to replace the old header that essentially divided our living room into two spaces. It will be a huge space, and we will use it as two spaces eventually (an area by the front window with a couple of chairs and a table between them, will become somewhat of a “sitting room”), but it is nice to have the freedom to decide furniture placement not based on some arbitrary header beam on the ceiling.

In case you've forgotten, here is the beam before:

The dreadful entry way tile has been almost completely removed to make way for the new hardwood flooring that will be installed. Electrical rough ins are almost complete, as are plumbing rough ins, and HVAC rough ins. A few more city inspections need to be completed, but then they can begin adding new drywall. Perhaps by the end of next week we will see walls and ceilings starting to take shape?

On the disturbing end of things, we now have a portable toilet in our driveway. There is some plumbing issue with our brand new basement toilet (T had lots of fun cleaning out all that backed up into our brand new shower down there), that is supposedly being taken care of today. The portable toilet was mostly a response to that event, and frankly wasn’t the most welcome sight when I drove up to our house last night. Oh well. I’ll admit I wasn’t crazy about all of the workers using our bathrooms, but much prefer it to having a Biffy in our driveway!

So how are we coping with all of the chaos in our house? We are doing okay. We are using the wet bar, that isn’t very wet, as our temporary kitchen (the plumbers are supposed to give us a quote for hooking up actual plumbing to this sink…right now it has refrigerator tubing, and the flow is about one drop per minute). We have the old pantry cabinet in the basement so most of our food is stored there, and the refrigerator was moved to the basement to make things livable for us. We have the microwave, and the toaster oven, and of course the gas grill outside. Thankfully we purchased the grill with a side burner last summer because it definitely comes in handy for boiling pasta – a staple for our kids’ limited palates. We’ve altered our dinner menu choices to reflect the absence of a range, but have found that the toaster oven does quite well with small portions of frozen fries or chicken nuggets. I get a little grumpy about having to walk any dishes over to the utility room to wash them in the utility sink, but aside from that it works (as does using mostly paper plates/bowls/cups).

There are some minor annoyances that come with the territory, things like having the basement disturbed because plumbing, HVAC, or electrical needs to be run in the basement ceiling. There is also having the plumbing main shut off during the day which means when we turn on faucets they all sputter as the air escapes, and my stupid alarm clock that is always blinking when I go to bed at night because a circuit breaker was switched off.

See how nice and open our entry way is now?

Still it isn’t all bad. Living in the basement has given me a new appreciation for just how nice our back yard is. It isn’t a big back yard, but there is plenty of space for the kids to run and play. We’ve been outside a lot more than normal. It is hard to say if that is because we simply look outside the sliding glass door and see the deck/yard, because it has been so warm lately, or because the kids are finally old enough to request er demand to go outside. I’ve also been trying to keep up with the weeding for the first time since we moved in more than two years ago, which I’m sure pleases our neighbors. Of course now I’ve begun dreaming of removing all of the old rotting railroad ties that form our landscaping, and remember that we can’t spend money on landscaping this year. Anyway, a huge benefit this year is that there is absolutely no guilt on my part for ordering The Girl’s birthday cake, and ordering all of the food for her birthday party that will take place this weekend. I have an excuse not to cook this year (not that I would have made the cake anyway, but I’m rationalizing here).

Some backyard fun:
The Boy mowing (that is a bubble mower he's not even four!) - just a glimpse but you can see how nice our neighbors lawn is, in comparison to ours

The Girl just being cute:

And some swinging on Mother's Day - not our backyard!

Seven things about me

2007-05-15T11:25:00.000-05:00

Jennifer tagged me for this, so that is my excuse. I’m not big on memes because usually I’m just too self-absorbed to want to answer questions other people have posed to me. I’d rather just blather on about what I want to talk about and screw everyone else. Still, I guess this meme is all about me, so I’ll play along. The gist of this meme is that I’m supposed to tell you seven things about me that I want you to know. So here goes:

One
I’m obsessed with running. If I don’t run for a couple of days I start to get an itch, and I start making everyone around me miserable. T has been known to tell me “go for a run,” when I am complaining about something trivial. It usually works. I’ve been a runner since 1999, and have only taken two brief breaks from it since then (surrounding the births of my children). I was so sad when extreme calf pain forced me to stop running when I was pregnant with The Boy, and while I continued to walk it just wasn’t the same. People figured I was miserable because I was in my third trimester, but the truth was that I was miserable because I couldn’t run. I promptly started running again when he was around 2 weeks old. I think I waited 3 weeks after The Girl was born, because the logistics were such that it just wasn’t possible to run before then.

Two
I have a bachelor’s of Mechanical Engineering (yes that’s a BME not a BS), but I have zero mechanical aptitude. T once told me that a colleague of his had said “it must be cool to have a wife that is a mechanical engineer, because she can fix things.” He laughed heartily at the poor guy, because he has seen my ability to fix things. I understand math, I understand physics, and honestly that is what you need to be an engineer, fixing things has nothing to do with it! Plus the MBA has effectively cancelled out all of my engineering knowledge.

Three
I have a hard time spending money on myself. I will buy the kids new clothes, T new clothes, and things for the house before I will buy myself new clothes. When I do buy clothes I tend to buy things that are on clearance, and have the hardest time spending much more than $50 on any article of clothing. Really less than $30 is my comfort zone. I am one to agonize over a purchase for weeks before following through, or more likely before convincing myself that I don’t need it.

Four
I’m addicted to caffeine. I routinely have 3 cups of coffee a day at a minimum. Thankfully I don’t have to pay for the coffee at work, though to be fair the free coffee is the reason I’m at 3 cups a day now. I’m also addicted to diet soda, but I have managed to wean myself down to just one can per day. I really like Diet Cherry Vanilla Dr. Pepper, yummy!

Five
I think my kids are the brightest, cutest, best kids in the entire world. Oh, I am capable of seeing the good in other people’s kids, but my own will always be better. No offense.

Six
I hate having my house ripped up. I need to have a sense of order in my life, and having the entire main floor of my house destroyed is not good for this desire. I put the kids’ toys away for them most of the time because I just can’t handle looking at the clutter. I even clean The Boy’s room for him almost nightly because those dumped over toy bins drive me absolutely insane. Also, the stepping on a hot wheels car or Lego in the middle of the night isn’t so fun either, so cleaning has a practical side.

Seven
You would think I had always been a neat freak based on number six above, but that isn’t the case. I was a slob until well into my twenties. I’m not sure what changed, but I do recall that T and I would leave stacks of dishes in the sink until we just had no dishes left to use. The thought of that now makes me want to vomit, but I guess at that point in my life it was okay.

Now it is time for me to tag others for this meme. This is tricky since most of my default tagees have already been tagged. I’m tagging Kate, Leslie, and Christine, have fun!

Not twice the effort

2007-05-14T14:11:00.000-05:00

I had a fabulous run yesterday, one of those runs where you feel like you could run forever, but your body still thanks you when you stop after 6.5 miles. I wasn’t running fast by any means, but I did finally venture back to the scene of the great snake sighting. Running by that creek always puts me in a good mood. I was reminded again just how lucky I am to have such a scenic trail so close to home. Mostly though I just let my mind wander. I started thinking that I should really sign up for a race because it has been many months since I last raced. Perhaps a summer half marathon is in order to spur me to run longer than a seven mile long run each week (or 6.5). I should check the race calendar to see what my options are.

As I was contemplating the idea of a half marathon, I was reminded of a conversation I had after completing one of my early half marathons. I was relating that a half marathon was a huge effort, and I didn’t see how it would be possible to run twice as long in order to complete a full marathon. A half marathon was taxing enough, I just didn’t see how I could expend even more effort to run a full. I honestly can’t remember who it was that responded that “A marathon isn’t twice the effort; it is the same effort, longer.” I remember thinking this couldn’t possibly be true, but after running a few marathons I’d wager that she was right. Of course getting to the point of being able to expend the same effort for twice as long isn’t trivial. It takes many weeks, and many long runs in order to build your endurance to that point.

I was trying to decide if the whole not twice the effort, just the same effort longer thing works for other areas of my life. Does it work for having more than one kid? No, having two kids is definitely more effort than having just one. Or is it? Yes, most definitely it is. Although, a case could be made that it is just the same effort longer. I mean yes there are two kids to get dressed in the morning, two kids to help put shoes on, two kids to get strapped into their car seats, and two kids to hug and kiss goodbye when they are dropped off at daycare. That all boils down to the same effort spread over more time though. Helping The Boy get dressed isn’t all that different from helping The Girl get dressed, one involves a diaper change and the other involves some prodding to use the toilet. Still, it isn’t all bad, there are now two kids who look at me like I am their world, two kids who say “I love you Mommy,” or in the case of The Girl “My love you Mommy.” Two kids who I get to watch transform before my eyes as they learn and grow each and every day.

I don’t plan on running any marathons in the near future, but it is clear that I will be participating in plenty of endurance sporting for the next several years. Yes, I will keep running, but the biggest test of my endurance to date seems to be this thing called parenting. There is no option of taking the DNF here either. In a marathon I can quit at any point, but with kids we have to just keep on running no matter how tired we are. Whether it is lying on the floor until The Girl goes to sleep, or handling the tough life and death questions with some sort of clarity, there is always a new challenge. I expect that while the physically challenging aspects of parenting (sleep deprivation, having to carry children around, etc.) will diminish as the kids age, the new mental challenges will be just as great. I swear, I never thought of any of this when we first decided to have kids.

Screening

2007-05-11T13:43:00.000-05:00

The Boy has his preschool screening tomorrow morning. It is required in our school district, and needs to be completed between the ages of 3.5 and 4. I’m a little nervous about the screening, however irrational that may be. I was filling out the intake paperwork the other night and it asked me to list my child’s strengths. How can I possibly do that? Picking my child’s best qualities? It seems impossible to me since he has so many, and the space on the form is very limited. I have to make T take a look tonight because perhaps he is a bit more objective than I am.

I’m not going to link to the screening information, but here is a snippet from their website:

What is Early Childhood Screening?
Screening is a free check of your child's vision, hearing, height, weight, and development, as well as a review of her or his immunization records. Children are screened by licensed teachers from the Family Center. Your child will be assessed in three important developmental areas, motor skills, concepts, and communication skills. This not an IQ test. It does not rank children according to scores. The purpose of screening is early detection of children's development, health, and other factors that may interfere with a child's learning, growth, and
development.
Following screening, a teacher will talk with you about your child's results. You'll have the opportunity to discuss any concerns you may have about your child's development or circumstances that could affect your child's learning. The teacher may refer you and your child to another agency to be rechecked or to receive services that will help your child. The screening process takes about 45 minutes.
Please note: For the most accurate results, it is best if parents are not present in the same room as the child during screening. Parents wait in a room close by. Please explain this to your child before you come to screening.

I don’t know why, but the biggest issue I have with this is the being separated from my child during the screening. I’ve written before about The Boy’s natural tendencies, and I worry just a little that he will not speak to the screener at all. Of course he will likely do much better with no parent around than he would with me hovering. I realize this is just a blip in what will be many “tests” of my children as they grow, but it makes me face the reality that he is getting older. I hate that testing has to begin so early.

Best you've never heard of

2007-05-09T15:04:00.000-05:00

If you read any of the big popular blogs I’m sure you have seen the varied blog awards that are floating about. Nominate what you think is the perfect post for the month, or the post that made you pee your pants because you laughed so hard, or just nominate/vote for the best *insert blogging niche here* blog around. You know what I’m talking about, and if you don’t just check out the links. I’m not all that interested in those contests, well truthfully, if I were to win something I would likely become interested, but that is neither here nor there! It is not that I think there is anything wrong with the awards; it is just that I don’t make the time to read a large number of blogs on a regular basis. I try to comment on a post if it resonates with me, but sometimes I am too pressed for time to even do that. Or sometimes I’m stealing a few minutes in the office and I need to Alt Tab away from my IE window so it doesn’t look like I’m wasting time at work. The majority of the time I put my focus back on the super fascinating spreadsheets or PowerPoint presentation I am working on and forget what I was going to say. Blogging and reading blogs is, my hobby, not the job that pays the bills (you’ve seen the house renovation posts, believe me I need the job!).

What exactly am I getting at here huh? I do have a slew of favorite blogs. I read them fairly regularly, some are big popular blogs, some are small private blogs, and others are well somewhere in the middle. Although I do have links to a few of my favorite blogs over on the right, I thought I would give some love to the special little gems I read. This is my attempt at a Mother’s Day present for them and hopefully others as well.

PDX Mama is fabulous in so many ways, the least of which not being that our oldest children are just one day apart. We met on a message board that shall remain unnamed way back when we were both struggling to breastfeed our lazy little firstborn nursers, and have become closer as the years have gone by. She has a fabulous positive outlook on life, and her enthusiasm is often contagious. She is also real, and I love that about her, and her blog! It is also wonderful to read about her new running adventures, as I can see glimpses of me back in 1999 when I first started running. PDX Mama is also great about pointing me to other good blogs. If I recall correctly she was responsible for first leading me to Mom 101 (must have been the too young for Chutes and Ladders post). I’ve also picked up a few new favorites just from looking at the blogs of those who comment on PDX Mama (Lawyer Mama for one).

Another of my favorites is Jennifer at Take a Walk on the Childside. Hers was the first blog I read regularly. Reading her blog is what led me to believe I could possibly manage to have a blog of my own, or rather that my ramblings could possibly be interesting to other people. Jennifer is a strong woman, and while she has had some struggles lately, I know she will emerge through them as the powerful woman she is.

I do have other favorites, but I just don’t have time to pay them the respect they deserve right now. Mostly I want to hear about your own little favorite blog in the rough. Tell me about your favorite blog that nobody has ever heard of (in the comments here or back on your own blog – link here and I’ll find you eventually).

To all of my reader Moms, I just want to say Happy Mother’s Day a little early. Forget about what your significant other or your kids do or don’t do for you on Mother’s Day. Take some time to give yourself a pat on the back for doing a great job. This Motherhood job is often thankless, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t valuable. If you get a moment, just sit back and look at your kids when they aren’t paying attention. You know they are the best kids around. You get the credit for that, and you deserve to celebrate it.

Of course I can’t leave this without giving a shout out to my own Mom, thanks for being such an inspiration to me. I love you Mom!

Remodel: Day two

2007-05-09T09:36:00.000-05:00

I managed to take and upload pictures yet again, so here are some day two photos:

The carpet is now gone, apparently the previous owners had pets…ick

The half bath now has the level of privacy the kids only dream of for the rest of the bathrooms (when T or I are using them that is):

A nice view from the kitchen

The office has been demolished:

The basement stairs are next, plastic sheeting installed in preparation:

Life isn’t all bad for us though; the new basement bathroom is really nice, just missing some molding and trim:

The shower:

This will all be worth it 3 months from now. This will all be worth it 3 months from now. This will all be worth it 3 months from now…

Remodel: Day one

2007-05-08T10:38:00.000-05:00

Yes, we have lost our minds, and our main floor. I cannot promise to update with pictures every day, but I will make an effort to post pictures periodically as the project progresses. These pictures were all taken yesterday.

The before pictures just before I left for work yesterday:

Yesterday evening:

The kids seem to enjoy chaos, The Boy keeps asking to “go see the wires” in reference to the electric lines that are hanging from the ceiling. Don’t worry, he is carefully supervised, and has been warned that they are not for touching.

Birth, death, and frogs

2007-05-07T15:57:00.000-05:00

I worked from home with the kids in my care on Friday. Don’t even bother to ask me how much work I got done, because my monthly time is now corrected to show some PTO on Friday. Seriously, why I think working from home with my kids there is possible I will never know. Anyway, as I was trying to work on some fascinating spreadsheets, and was interrupted for the 100th time by The Girl trying to “help” me type, and The Boy whining for something I called it quits and we all headed outside. I decided that we could play in the backyard, and while the kids were playing I could attend to the much neglected 5 million planting beds we have. I wasn’t trying to do anything strenuous, just trying to clear away some of last year’s perennial growth. We don’t actually plant anything in the beds, just wait for the perennials to come up on their own, and hope for the best. On the side of the house I found egg shells (big eggs too…chicken egg sized), and feathers. Aha, now the fact that I had seen a pair of mallards in the driveway, and the female on the lawn made much more sense. We had ourselves a little nest. I rushed to show the kids. The Girl wasn’t all that interested, but The Boy immediately started asking questions. “Why are the eggs broken?” “Why are the ducks gone?” “Why did they build a nest?” “Why did they watch the eggs until they hatched?” “Why, why, why?” Eventually we made our way back to the sand box.
*I’ll come back and post a picture of the eggs if I can get my stuff together to actually take one*

I worked my way around the back yard, and in opening one of the gates on our deck came across a small gray tree frog (T tells me this is the same tree frog we saw last year, who presumably really likes the space between the posts on the deck gate, as that is where we found him on at least 2 other occasions). I jumped in horror, and gave a tiny shriek. I’m not a big fan of frogs. Still, I managed to hold it together, and gathered the kids around because I figured they would be interested in seeing the frog. The Boy was very excited. The Girl had her foot extremely close to the frog, so close that I said “don’t step on the frog honey.” Her next move was to step on the frog. I think I managed to pull her off in time, but that frog was awfully sluggish after her foot was removed. I did my best to shoo the frog off of the deck without actually touching him, and he reluctantly hopped away. I checked back there yesterday, and no frog could be found. Either he had massive internal injuries and is now dead, or he has smartened up and found a new hiding spot…perhaps with the colony of rabbits that live under our deck.

Of course the wonders of nature would not be complete without actually finding a dead animal. Saturday morning, the kids were outside playing in the sandbox, and we stumbled upon a dead bird. It had most likely flown into the side of our house. The kids weren’t very interested, until I got the shovel and removed the bird from the deck. The Boy kept asking me “why did the bird get dead Mommy?” I didn’t know what to tell him. The answer of, well the bird flew into the house and it made him sick, didn’t seem to compute. He came up with “sometimes birds just die.” I mistakenly said something to the effect of “well everything dies eventually,” and he took hold “but I don’t die Mommy.” Shoot that is not a conversation I want to have with him just now. I stumbled something like “no, you’re not dying honey.” I didn’t think I needed to explain the cycle of life to him, and frankly I know he isn’t ready to comprehend it just yet. This being the interpreter of the universe business is a very tricky aspect of parenting.
*Don’t worry, I promise I won’t post a picture of the dead bird*

Shuffling

2007-05-04T08:13:00.000-05:00

I have been the proud owner of an MP3 player for many years, but I have been endlessly mocked by my DH for never changing the music on it. I use it only for running, and in a way it is sort of comforting to know that I'll hear the same mix each and every time. I'm not sure what that says about me. Anyway, part of it is laziness, because the MP3 player is so old we only have the software loaded on our old ancient computer. It takes like a year for that computer to boot up, and frankly I just don't have the patience for that. I really had no intention of actually updating the music on it anyway.

When I saw my brother on our most recent vacation he presented me with an Ipod Shuffle as a belated birthday present. This is the part where I feel badly, because I don't think I've acknowledged one of his birthdays in at least 5 years. Anyway, I finally got around to playing with the cute little Magenta Shuffle, and I'm in love. It is so cute, it is so quick to upload music too, and I even purchased my first song from Itunes. I guess I wasn't as happy with the same old mix as I thought I was. I fear this Itunes thing might become an expensive habit. It is so easy to just spend $.99 to get a fresh song. Dangerous.

The laughable links

2007-05-01T10:30:00.000-05:00

I use gmail for my personal email. I like being able to read them at work, but not have them tied to my work email account for various reasons. Mostly gmail is wonderful; however, the suggested links sometimes drive me crazy.

Apparently I have been discussing something with someone on my contact list that would suggest I am interested in pursuing a nursing degree:
School of Nursing
Traditional BSN & ADN Program Openings for 2007 class
-link removed so I don’t advertise something I don’t care about

I’ve been talking about my kids:
Parenting advice
For happy children and parents Learn from experts about all ages
-Another link removed so I don’t advertise something I don’t care about

No idea here, apparently I’ve been really concerned about the privacy of my medical records:
HIPAA-Compliant Laptops
SafeBook Thin Client Notebook $799 No hard drive - protects your data
-Another link removed so I don’t advertise something I don’t care about

Not only do I talk about my kids, but I guess I’ve been considering starting a business that targets kids:
Several Kids Franchises
Choose from the Top Childrens Franchise That Fit Your Need!
-Another link removed so I don’t advertise something I don’t care about

And well, these are just disturbing. I don’t know where the animal health care topic came from, but the bariatric surgery ones are just insulting. I think I may have mentioned running in my emails, apparently if you are considering some form of exercise you should also explore surgically altering the size of your stomach.

More about...
Animal Health Care »
My state Bariatric Surgery »
Bariatric Treatment »
My state Bariatric Surgeons »

I’ve also had a slew of kitchen renovation related links, and some links inviting me to put my kids in cute kid contests. My favorite link so far is the one directing me to a book called “Why Mommy Is a Democrat.” Yes, well, I didn’t realize we needed a children’s book to explain that one. I haven’t read it, and I assume it is a fine publication eschewing the virtues of being a democrat. I’m also sure it would not be the book The Boy chooses to read every night. I doubt I would be able to read it without laughing. Honestly, I hope that more than anything else my kids are able to look at issues and come up with their own viewpoints. I have no intention of telling my children they should be democrats. Obviously I won’t tell them to be republicans either, but you get the drift.

I’ll keep typing away, adding all the more searchable keywords to my repertoire every day. Maybe one day my gmail links will be as freakishly accurate as my Amazon links are. Seriously, how do they know to recommend music CDs I already own and love (and didn’t buy on Amazon)? They have some wicked good profiling going on in there.

100th post

2007-04-26T14:13:00.001-05:00

I’ve had quite a few days in a row of posting here, which obviously isn’t the norm for me. I’m trying to decide if it is because I’ve had something to say, or because I’ve seen that I was creeping closer to 100 posts. In any case, here it is the 100th post. Now what?

I’ve decided that I would just recap some of my favorite posts. It seems that most of the posts that I really enjoy are not the posts with comments. For one reason or another, these posts clearly communicated something in a way that felt cathartic to me. They were/are posts that I go back and read periodically because they give me a warm glow, or perhaps I thought they were funny, witty, whatever. This is the part of the sitcom where they call it a new episode, but they really just have the characters sitting on a couch (I’m clearly envisioning episodes of The Cosby Show that have been in this vein, because I’ve seen every single episode of The Cosby Show at least twice...did you know that in the first episode The Cosby’s only had 4 children, the oldest, Saundra, did not exist yet?) reminiscing so they can show scenes from past episodes. Is that called recycling? I’m not going to rank my posts, but I will offer tidbits I feel are warranted along the way. Don’t worry, you don’t really have to go back and read the old posts if you don’t want to!

My first blog post makes the list because it was my first post of course. It attempted to capture the frantic pace of life I was feeling at the time. Two little kids at home, still breastfeeding and pumping for the youngest, working full time, just trying to juggle everything while staying relatively sane. Survival Mode.

How potty training a child can turn an otherwise reasonable adult into an incompetent fool also makes the list. At the time I was just so clearly fed up with the whole potty training process. It seems so foreign to me now that he is potty trained. I can see that I was wasting my time getting so worked up about it. It was never about me, it was about him, and when he was ready it just happened. Potty Training Drop Out.

I didn’t pick any of my other business travel rants because most of them are just very negative. Looking back I can see how unhealthy it was for me to constantly complain about travel. All it did was make me miserable. Must. Remember. That. The. Next. Time. I. Travel. For. Work. Still, this post makes the list because I still think it is incredibly funny that my colleague would chose to eat Slim Fast and Beef Jerky for dinner rather than to just go to a restaurant with me for 30 minutes! Slim Fast and Beef Jerky.

The post I wrote on The Boy’s last birthday makes the list because it just does. I felt like it captured many of the thoughts I was reflecting upon that day. We get so caught up in our kids’ accomplishments that we forget that we are learning and growing as they age as well. Every once in a while we need to pat ourselves on the back for the wonderful job we are doing just by taking care of our kids each and every day. It is no small feat, raising kids. Thank you for teaching me.

The gift bag post was selected because I feel it does a good job of challenging some of the backlash parents have towards the excesses of birthday parties today. Do I think birthday celebrations can be overblown? Yes. Do I think giving kids gift bags has to be a bad thing? No. We all need to stop looking at what everyone else is doing and just decide what is right for our own families. More importantly we need to stop judging other parents for what they do or don’t do in these contexts. What’s wrong with gift bags?

I so enjoy watching my kids play with Christmas ornaments. It isn’t that I am a Christmas freak, it isn’t that the toys are all that interesting, it just reminds me that I loved to play with the wooden ornaments when I was young. I thought it was extremely funny when The Boy proclaimed that “The snake ate the baby Jesus,” as he was playing with our ornaments last Christmas. Perhaps my story telling ability isn’t phenomenal, but in person this was hilarious! The snake ate the baby Jesus.

Turning off the television at our house in the morning, and ridding myself of my morning computer habit has made a profound impact on my life. It has been many months now, and my kids are watching far less television (A DVR’d episode of The Backyardigans some days after daycare, and an hour or so of whatever they choose each weekend morning), and the morning routine is much smoother than it ever used to be. I’m not going to say that mornings are hassle free, but there is no way we could go back to watching cartoons in the mornings now. The great no TV before daycare experiment.

As you might have picked up on from reading here I’ve been trying to be more positive since I read/watched The Secret. It really has had a profound impact on my life in more ways than one. I still find myself falling into the negative traps of my past, but I’m learning and growing. What do you want in your life?

The ode to my treadmill makes the list because my treadmill was my inspiration for my blog title. How can I not pay her homage? An Ode to my treadmill.

Finally I am going to select a very recent post. After reading the post that immediately preceded it a few times I decided that I needed to shift my attitude. The Girl is still a baby in so many ways, and I need to let her be one, stop willing her to grow up faster than she already is. On being 23 months old.

I hope this wasn’t too boring for you to read. I have most of my posts saved as Word documents so I can peruse them at my leisure fairly easily, but I hadn’t in a while. It has been a fun trip for me so far, thanks for reading!

P.S. This was more work to write than a normal blog post, so I take back my comments about recycling!

P.P.S. Tell me what you think of my new masthead. I've been meaning to customize it for ages, but finally got around to it.

Random observation of the week: kids notice stuff

2007-04-25T11:27:00.000-05:00

Monday evening the kids and I went for a walk. The Boy insisted that we go to the playground, but as it was already after 6:30 PM I knew the playground was a bad idea. He agreed that we could walk to the duck pond (his duck pond) instead. As we got closer to the pond (It is 0.3 miles from our house – sad bit of Garmin GPS running watch trivia I happen to have memorized) he started telling me that we would see “the eyeballs.” I had no idea what he was talking about. I just did my standard response when I don’t want to hurt his feelings or pry too deeply which was to say something along the lines of “okay.” Of course he kept persisting that we would see the eyeballs on the sign, and “have you seen that sign before Mommy?” I had no idea what he was talking about, so I had to start prodding for more information. “Where are the eyeballs honey?” I asked. “They are on the sign” he insisted. “What sign?” I continued. “The sign by the duck pond,” he said now clearly annoyed with me. Okay. Thankfully we got to the duck pond, and as we approached he kept saying “that sign there mommy!” I still had no idea what he was talking about. It wasn’t until we passed the sign (we could see just the blank back as we approached) that I figured out he had been talking about a neighborhood watch sign. Yes indeed, there is an eyeball on that sign. I’ve seen the sign a million times, but never really looked at it before.

It is amazing the things in this world we take for granted. It is nice to have a child point them out to you every now and again. I’m sure that from now on I will notice that sign. In fact, just this morning I realized that we have another eyeball sign (er neighborhood watch sign) in the space between our driveway and our neighbor’s driveway…the neighbor being a neighborhood watch “block captain” and all.

On being 23 months old

2007-04-24T14:55:00.000-05:00

This weekend The Girl passed a very important milestone in her life. It was not a milestone that anyone aside from me celebrated though. She turned 23 months old. It is significant because when her older brother turned 23 months old he got the gift of a sibling.

The Girl already has the gift of a sibling, but she did not receive a younger sibling (and there are currently no plans in place to provide her with one). I look at her now and wonder how we could have possibly thought The Boy was sufficiently old enough to be a big brother at this tender age. She is becoming more and more a little girl with each passing day, but in my eyes she is still a baby.

She isn’t a baby by the traditional sense of the word, she can speak in sentences, she feeds herself (and is quite proficient with utensils), she walks, she runs, she assists with dressing herself, can climb up into the minivan and get up into her car seat without help, etc. She does still wear diapers, and has that one last hold out bottle before bed. Of course the bottle is mostly my thing I’ll admit; it is sort of nice that she loves that last bit of cuddle time with me before sleep. I see the “babies” at daycare and think that they are all so tiny in comparison, but yet when I get The Girl home she goes right back to baby status in my eyes. I wonder if she will always seem like my baby. Her brother will always be older than her, but I suppose he won’t always be more advanced than she is.

I have such a hard time dealing with the idea that these little kids of mine will become bigger kids, and then teenagers, and finally adults. It seems almost impossible that my kids will one day grow up and not live in the same house I do. They are like extensions of my heart, walking around in the world, and someday I am supposed to let them go out in the world all on their own? I’m sure I will blink and The Girl will be on the brink of 4, and then 14, and then 22. This is why I need to stop dwelling on the nighttime routine. I know that eventually The Girl won’t want me lying on her bedroom floor, and will in fact shut the door on me when I try to do so. For this moment I need to be grateful for the baby I have, and I need to remember to stop willing her to grow up faster than she already is. Besides, it is DH’s turn to put the kids to bed tonight! *wink*

Wrapped around her finger

2007-04-23T15:46:00.000-05:00

Please tell me this is a phase. Lie to me if you have to, but I need to hear that I won’t be sleeping on the floor of The Girl’s bedroom for much longer than a week or two. We had a nice stretch in there of being able to simply plop The Girl in her crib, turn on her beloved Fisher Price Ocean Wonders Aquarium, say I love you, say goodnight, and walk away (this after reading books to her and The Boy). I’d love to blame the vacation for this newest turn of events, but truth be told it did start before then. I like to blame myself so I’m sure it was a direct result of my most recent business trip. Perhaps she missed me, perhaps she is getting the last of her teeth, the dreaded 2 year molars, or perhaps she is just testing us to see how much she can torture us. Who knows?

DH copes by bringing his laptop with him, and just working, surfing the internet, or playing solitaire while he waits for her to fall asleep. Providing reassurance along the way that he is still in the room by answering her continued questions of “where you going Daddy?” with “I’m here, go to sleep baby,” until she finally gives up. I take the less practical and more self defeating approach of just lying on the floor and then trying to inch my way out of the room so she doesn’t notice I’ve left. Her floor is creaky though, so inevitably I am caught and have to say “shhhh” a few times before The Girl trusts that I’m not trying to sneak away. I lay there thinking that surely this will be the last medley of Aquarium tunes, and that at the end of this set, she will be fast asleep so I can make my way out of the room. Inevitably the tunes end, she reaches up and presses the button yet again so we can hear that fabulous water bubbling noise combined with the light show and the melodies that will be forever ingrained in my head. The entire time I lie there calculating if it is better to sneak out before the aquarium shuts off or after, which risks a creak in the floor waking her up. It is painful. Back when this was the norm, I did bring my laptop into the room because it was far better than the lying on the floor waiting game, but I am digging in my heels now. Surely, this will be a short-lived phase.

Oh, I know many of you are thinking that we are horrible parents, who haven’t established rigid stable routines for our kids to follow, and perhaps you are right. I mean if your kids go to sleep easily I’ll be the first to admit my jealousy. Of course, The Boy does go to sleep easily, and always has. I remember patting ourselves on the back because we did everything right with him, putting him in his crib while he was still awake from very early on. Yes, there were paci replacement trips at night, but mostly he was a good sleeper from day one. Yes, while on vacation or otherwise away from his normal routines things get messed up for him in the sleep department, but he bounces back quickly. We do have a routine, that is very stable, and we aren’t hyping the kids up right before bed. The Girl just likes to know that she isn’t alone, and until she gets back to the place where she knows when we walk out of her room we will still come back when she needs us, she isn’t going to be there.

Yes, I realize we are caving into temper tantrums. We tried to let her CIO (cry it out) last week, and after an hour of listening to her scream I caved. I got into her room, and could smell that the poor thing had pooped. I changed her, put her back in her crib after some cuddles, patted her back, and she was asleep in minutes. Others will say that we just needed to wait longer (though obviously we had to change that diaper), just suck it up for the 3 hours it takes. I guess we’ve decided that the lying in her room routine is preferable to listing to her scream though. My little girl knows what she wants, when she wants it, and from whom it should be provided. Her parents know that sometimes it is just too painful to do what is right. Why does this have to be so hard?

Thankfully the trail is not well traveled

2007-04-22T20:15:00.000-05:00

I went out for a run this morning, and on the way to my favorite trail I was reminiscing about the beautiful things I've seen outside recently. A few weeks back I was running up the major street that is closest to my house. There is the hint of a bike path along one side of the road so I keep it in my running rotation. The street is very busy, but one side borders a wet land area. As I was running I glanced down into the swamp water immediately to my left I saw a beaver swimming. He/she quickly hightailed it away from my view, but I still got goosebumps thinking about how incredibly cool it is that I can be right next to a major road and still see wild animals going about their lives.

The beaver was a somewhat rare sighting for me. I mean I routinely see rabbits, mostly at our house since they seem to have formed a colony underneath our multi-level deck. Good thing we don't garden! I also see squirrels and chipmunks or gophers, whatever it is they actually are. Of course there are also the geese, and the ducks, the ducks who decided our driveway was a fine place to land a while back. Lest you think we live in the boonies, I'll say we are right smack in the middle of suburbia, albeit a suburb that does have a big chunk of undeveloped wetlands in the middle. Wednesday I saw a blue heron on the banks of a tiny pond as I ran past. It really has been a fabulous few weeks in the nature watching department.

All of the recent animal sightings had me in a glow of wonder and amazement. I decided to run down to my favorite creekside trail so I could enjoy the creek rather than staring at houses. The trail is a nice little treat. I started running because of this trail. We used to live much closer to the trail, so it was my daily running path, but now I only get over there a few times per month. I'd run a little over a mile on the trail when it happened. I saw a dead snake on the trail. I briefly freaked out, but since it didn't move at all I just gave it some space and kept on my way. Perhaps 40 feet later I saw another snake, and this one wasn't dead. I screamed. I stopped in my tracks, and I waited for the little baby garter snake to get out of my way. Shit. I hate snakes. All of my thoughts about how much I enjoy nature just vanished as I could feel my heart racing faster than the running pace I was keeping could cause. I'm sure I sounded like an idiot, but thankfully the trail is not well traveled. I doubt anybody heard my little girly scream. Stupid snake, now I'll have to avoid the trail for a few months before I feel like it is safe again.

What have we gotten ourselves into?

2007-04-19T14:40:00.000-05:00

I've mentioned our great remdeling plans before, but I haven't offered too many details. We have now ordered cabinets for the new kitchen, picked out plumbing fixtures, and will be choosing granite soon. It seems as though we have reached the point of no return, so I thought it was fair to show you some pictures of what we are planning. I'm sure I will complain much over the next few months as our house undergoes the chaos that is remodeling. Please bear with me.

Kitchen now (roughly, this photo was from the MLS listing, we have a new refrigerator since then, and a new dishwasher):

The newly designed kitchen from the eating area not visible in the previous photo:

The dining room now (again with the MLS listing, that is not our table):

The soon to be non-existant dining room:

And another view for good measure:

What have we gotten ourselves into?

Village Idiots

2007-04-18T14:26:00.000-05:00

I apologize for being scarce around here. We got back from our wonderful vacation on Sunday, but it has been a flurry of activity since then. Work has been crazy, and our big house remodel project has been kicked into high gear (we haven’t started yet, but we did order the kitchen cabinets today). Forget about the mundane day-to-day stuff though, in this post I am going to let you in on my vacation learnings:

1. I blogged about the great ash in the hot tub incident already, so I don’t need to go there
2. Crayola Color Wonder markers are fabulous, except when used to draw on stained wood closet doors. No, no, they don’t leave any colored marks on the doors, but they do leave a streak that can’t be easily removed (at least not without sanding and re-staining the doors). Even the fabulous Mr. Clean Magic Eraser is of no use.
3. A nearly 2 year old can be lightning quick when she thinks it is funny to run out into the street
4. Blond girl children need to wear hats or have sunscreen applied to their hair part lines in order to avoid sunburned heads
5. Non-blond Treadmillista’s also need to wear hats or put sunscreen in their hair part lines in order to avoid sunburned heads – OUCH!
6. The Boy really enjoys talking about toots, his, hers, made up toots, it doesn’t really matter, all are extraordinarily funny
7. It is difficult to get the kids to sleep at night while on vacation – understatement
8. Dirt is fun to play with – pouring it on Mommy’s head is absolutely thrilling
9. My laptop battery can’t even last through one viewing of Toy Story 2 anymore
10. The Girl needs her own seat on an airplane
11. When you check your car seats they don’t always arrive on the same flight you did
12. Having your child refer to a grandparent by the name of the state she lives in becomes confusing when you arrive in that state – are we going to name of state now?

I’m sure there are more. Perhaps the most profound learning for me was that when you have an extra set or two of adults around “watching” your children you all become a little less guarded than normal. I’m convinced that items 1 through 3 above would not have occurred had it been just DH and I on duty. This makes me question the whole “it takes a village” approach to raising kids. I mean, we all felt like someone else was watching the children, so none of us were watching them as closely as we should have been. Or perhaps it just shows that DH and I become the village idiots when we have back-ups around. In any case, my deepest apologies for any damage we may have done to your house Mom. We had a great time!

You got ash in my hot tub - or vacation at Mom's

2007-04-11T17:03:00.000-05:00

When those of us from the frozen tundra venture to warmer climates for spring vacations we have this subtle need to have it be wicked cold back home while we are gone. It isn't that we don't want spring to come to our home town, it is just that if we are escaping for a while it better not be warmer at home while we are gone! Thankfully the weather gods have come through this year. The treadmilling around family is visiting my Mom in her warmer climate home, while they are getting snow back home. Yipee!!! Sorry, I can't help that it makes me happy.

Things you can do outside in the spring when you live outside of the frozen tundra:
1. Run outside in shorts and a tank top and get too hot
2. Get a sunburn on your arms
3. Relax in a lawn chair outside in shorts and a t-shirt while reading a trashy book
4. Let your kids play outside all day long while wearing shorts, t-shirts, and sandals
5. Not wear a coat
6. Not wear mittens or hats
7. Have I mentioned shorts and t-shirts?
8. Feel too warm in the hot tub outside (before your oldest child decided that dumping a can of cigarette butts into the hot tub was a good idea)
9. Help try to clean out the hot tub with sieves
10. Help drain, clean, and refill the hot tub because you just can't get all of that nasty ash out of the water any other way

I'm sure I'll be scarce for the rest of the week, and hopefully the hot tub is back in commission in a couple of days. In case you were wondering, The Boy and The Girl were standing over the edge of the hot tub, using it as their own private water table, while DH and I watched from inside the house (kids clearly visible at all times). We had given them buckets, plastic ducks, and various other toys, and we just didn't realize that the old coffee can filled with cigarette butts would be so appealing to them. I saw him with the can and had an oh shit moment, and it was already too late. Secretly I think The Boy planned this, as the hot tub is normally far too hot for him to set foot in...now it will be cold for a few days and I'm sure he will get to try it out. Or maybe I'm giving him more credit than he deserves, he's used to drainable sinks and bathtubs afterall.

Stroller intervention

2007-04-05T06:46:00.000-05:00

The treadmilling around family consists of two parents, two kids, two plants, and four strollers. How do I explain the four strollers you ask? Well, we have the Graco Metrolite stroller that was handy for snapping infant carrier carseats into when the kidlets were tiny, then there is the Kool Stride by Kool Stop jogging stroller for when I need to run but have a kidlet in my care (we don't have a double jogger because well I'd mostly rather run on the treadmill than push two kids in a jogging stroller, but that is just me). We also have a Combi Twin Savvy double side-by-side stroller, which was handy in the days when The Boy would still sit in a stroller. Our forth stroller is a Koolcraft cheapie $20 green umbrella stroller. So which stroller do you think we use the most often? Truth be told our most loved stroller is the Graco stroller. However, we haven't spent much time cleaning it, and since it has gotten so much love it is pretty disgusting now. Yes, we could clean it out, give it a little stroller tune up so it performs optimally, but instead I've decided we need a new umbrella type stroller. We need one with a storage basket underneath you see. Now I just need to sell this idea to my DH. Do you think he will be excited about adding a 5th stroller to our family? I'm leaning towards no, but when it just shows up at our house for use on our upcoming vacation I figure he will just adjust.

It is a good thing I don't have a shoe habit, because with soon to be 5 strollers, and the at least 7 diaper bags that have passed through my possession I have another problem. I have a baby gear addiction. Do you think there is hope for me? I suppose the habit will just naturally end since my youngest child is nearly two years old now. I don't think I need an intervention.

No, but I didn't stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night

2007-04-03T22:30:00.000-05:00

I'm not ignoring my blog, just traveling for work again. I don't even have the energy to complain about it. Come to think of it, why in the hell am I still up at 10:30 PM when a full night of non nearly-two-year-old-sleep-disruption is on tap? I always seem to stay up later when I travel. The 9 PM cutoff time doesn't apply when I travel, and neither does the no morning internet policy. I mean I have no trouble getting to the client site on time when I only have to dress and feed myself, and don't have to drop off children at daycare. I can even manage to blow dry my hair when I stay in a hotel, crazy but true.

Speaking of hotels though, I do have one gripe. We are staying at a hotel that was carefully selected by our client. I'm assuming the $69 per night rate was the main draw, since this client is paying directly for our travel costs. I suppose it could just be a random selection though, we should really investigate. The hotel is kind of dumpy, there are ants in my room, the hotel screams "I was built in the 70's so live with it," and well it is a Holiday Inn (not a Holiday Inn Express, because clearly if I had stayed there I'd be able to perform miraculous feats). The most horrible thing about the hotel though is the lack of Comedy Central. Seriously do you think they get a big discount for providing just a smattering of basic cable channels, with HBO thrown in for good measure? Last time I checked Comedy Central was a mainstay of basic cable. What am I supposed to do without my John Stewart fix each night? We really need to look into that slingbox thing so I can watch our DVR'd stuff remotely...

Skinny pants

2007-03-29T08:09:00.000-06:00

My friends, today is a monumental day in this treadmill addict’s life. Brace yourself. Wait for it. Just a little longer. Okay, today I am wearing my skinny pants. This is not to say that I should be wearing my skinny pants, but I am anyway. I’ve been slowly losing weight since the beginning of the year. I’ve been loosely following my own little twisted version of Weight Watchers just for the fun of it, and it has worked. I am not yet down to my ultimate goal weight, but I am inching closer every week.

Every so often I pull out my skinny pants and use them to see how much progress I’ve made, and typically they go right back into the drawer. The last time I tried them on, I was giddy because I could button and zip them with little effort, but as they are fairly low rise pants the love handle hang-over issue was keeping me from wearing them in public. This morning on a whim, I tried them on, zipped them up and decided the hang-over factor wasn’t bad enough to keep me from wearing them! Of course I’m wearing a zip up hoodie sweatshirt over a fitted tee so as to minimize the effect. I can’t tell you how happy it makes me that I can now wear these pants. I don’t think I have worn them since before The Boy was conceived, although there might have been a brief stint centered around my training for the marathon I ran between The Boy and The Girl when they fit. Of course you now have to realize that it has been nearly 5 years since I was wearing these pants often, and maybe 7 years since they were purchased. Do you think they are still in style? Not likely. Oh well, it is not that I have ever been in style anyway. At least I am out of style and happy about it.

Which part did you like again?

2007-03-27T09:39:00.000-06:00

I have been on a baby-step paced quest to improve my life lately. There have been little improvements that have already had a great impact on my life: the great no TV before daycare experiment has been a tremendous success, and the 9 PM internet cutoff time is making me more interactive with my DH. I feel more connected to him than I have in a long time, which is very nice. I still keep losing my cool with the kids too often, but as I said, this is a baby-step paced campaign. I know I cannot change everything overnight, because frankly I have far too many quirks to focus on at once. I am focusing on the things I know I can impact in short order. I went to the doctor last week to finally have a suspicious mole evaluated, so I could put the negativity and fear of skin cancer out of my mind. I arranged a trip to see my Mom because seeing her more often is important to me. You get the drift.

I feel like I need to preface this with the fact that my life is already pretty damn good. I am not trying to struggle through difficult circumstances at the moment. I am simply trying to make a life I am very happy with, a life that I am grateful for, a life that has been blessed in many ways just a little bit better. I have two tremendous kids, a husband I love dearly, supportive parents who are still living, a great network of friends, and enough money to live comfortably without worrying how bills will be paid. I’m just making little tweaks.

The one big area of my life I feel needs to change is my professional life. I was describing my job to a group of runner friends this weekend, and heard myself saying I like my job, but I don’t like X aspect, oh and I don’t like Y aspect, oh and I forgot about Z. One of the women asked me which part it was that I liked. I was silenced. I did come up with a few things I like, but it put my job, which I claim to enjoy, into focus. You’ve heard me complain about work travel before, so I think that topic has been covered. Truthfully there aren’t any terrible downsides to my job (well *ahem* travel is one), but there are some issues. Issues that I don’t really want to discuss here because I do want to keep the job for the foreseeable future. I think it comes down to the fact that I want to be excited about work. I don’t necessarily need to be in bliss all day at work, but I want work to give me a sense of accomplishment, a sense that I am good at what I do. I do not want to simply put in time to fill a quota of hours per week. Truthfully, that is what I am doing most of the time. What exactly is my ideal job? I might be able to keep my current position and achieve much of what I want, but I don’t know yet. I need to think about it for a while. I know if I put the right focus towards it, I’ll find my answers…I just need to give it some time and a lot of thought.

Save Studio 60, or something like that

2007-03-25T13:16:00.000-06:00

Okay, so I highly doubt that this makes much of a difference at all, but given my love for the doomed Studio 60, I had to at least post a link. Vote here to save Studio 60. I confess that it was really hard for me not vote for Gilmore Girls, but that is more guilty pleasure than good show...and we've had it for so many seasons already. I mean Rory is graduating from Yale this year, how much more can we ask for?

Slow down there sweetie

2007-03-21T13:15:00.000-06:00

A few weeks ago I was getting dressed in the morning and The Girl woke up (she was in our bed) to find me in the process of getting dressed. I was wearing pants but hadn’t yet decided on a shirt so I was roaming around with just a bra on top. The Girl was fascinated. She pointed at my bra and asked “Wha zat?” I told her what it was, and she begged to be picked up so she could have a closer look. She touched it, she peered inside and asked me what the contents were, and just generally became very familiar with the concept. Then she tried to get it away from me. I explained that this was in fact, Mommy’s bra, which she didn’t seem to like but eventually accepted. She then asked “Where my ba?” Well who am I to resist her little head tilt and arms raised up in question, so I riffled through my drawer and handed her one of my old worn out bras. She didn’t want it though. I suspect it was because the one I gave her wasn’t formed at all, and just wasn’t as interesting to play with. She persisted, so I found the bra I’d worn the previous day and handed it to her. She was thrilled. She then asked me to help her put it on. I didn’t want to help her, but I just couldn’t stop myself. Of course the bra was far too big around on her, but she still walked around for a good 2 minutes saying “My ba.” DH rolled his eyes at me, but I know he thought it was funny.

Now I have to hurry every time I change clothes so I can keep her from seeing my bra. If she sees mine she gets very pissy when I don’t produce the “My ba” for her again. We tested her knowledge at Target the other day. We were walking past the lingerie department and she went nuts when we past the bras. She got very excited and started pointing and saying “ba, ba, ba!” Thankfully other people probably just presume she is doing her fabulous sheep imitation.

The last time she modeled her “My ba” around for me I pulled her aside and informed her that she has a good 8 years before she really needs one, and perhaps she could just forget about them for now. She just smiled at me. I don’t even want to think about my baby being old enough to need a bra. Slow down there sweetie, and play with my shoes instead, that doesn’t give me the same heart stopping reaction.

Cutting myself off

2007-03-19T20:02:00.000-06:00

I am addicted to mindlessly surfing the web after my children go to sleep. I read up on the three message boards I frequent, then I rotate through them again in search of more new posts, then I search through them again, etc., then I read a few blogs, then I check my home email account which only ever gets spam, just to have the pleasure of deleting it. I've recently come to the conclusion that this adds little value to my life. I'm not saying that I'm going to stop doing it, just that I have come up with a cut-off time for internet usage each night.

Last week I tried implementing a 9 PM cutoff time, and it works pretty well. DH and I actually had a good conversation one of those nights because I wasn't off in the office while he was in the living room (on his laptop). Of course the conversation resulted in me saying that I would help more with the great basement remodel projects. He has been pressing me each and every day since then, and it turns out that I just don't want to help with those projects. I always assumed he liked doing them, but it turns out he would rather do almost anything else instead too. Strange. Perhaps this internet cutoff plan is bad. I could have lived in bliss that he enjoyed sanding and staining doors, but now I have to live with the knowledge that he is suffering for our family's future basement enjoying pleasure. I suppose I could suck it up and help sand and stain. Best case, he mocks my skills and I get to go back into my slacker domain, worst case is that I get stuck helping indefinitely. Have I mentioned that I do all of the laundry for the family every Sunday? Yes, that is 6-7 loads of laundry every Sunday. I just had to throw that in there, in case you were feeling sorry for my DH.

Yes, I realize this was posted after 9 PM.

Not a shoe girl

2007-03-16T12:50:00.000-06:00

I have a horrible confession to make. It turns out that I am not “into shoes.” I don’t know how many episodes of Sex and the City I’ve watched and been completely dumbfounded by Carrie’s ability to spend all of her money on Manolo Blahniks (in case you are wondering I had to google that in order to spell it correctly!). When I see expensive shoes I typically think that they look uncomfortable, and can’t imagine spending so much money on them. I have three pairs of shoes that I alternate between for every day wear (not including my running shoes). I have a pair of brown loafers made by Timberland, which were less than $40. I’ve had them for at least the past 3 years. I wear them to work with everything except black pants. I also have a pair of black loafers made by Dockers, also in the neighborhood of $40, and they are older than the tan shoes. They have a bit of a heel so I like that they make me feel somewhat taller than normal, but otherwise they are very plain. I wear them with black pants, and occasionally with tan pants (especially on business trips when I don’t want to pack more than one pair of shoes in my carry-on…because you know I always have to pack my running shoes). The third pair is sort of a running shoe/mule hybrid. They are New Balance shoes, and fit the bill for weekend wear, or when running errands after work. They go well with shorts, yoga pants, and wind pants (my “play clothes”). I think I spent closer to $50 on them.

I do have more than just those shoes, I have a collection of dressy shoes that I purchased to wear with specific dresses, but they just collect dust in my closet. Most of them are horribly out of style, and extremely uncomfortable. I also have a small spattering of sandals that I’ll drag out in the summer if I don’t feel like wearing my running shoe/mule hybrids. The kids like to pull my “dressy” shoes out to play with, and I never object because someone might as well get some use out of them. Running shoes are an entirely different subject, but I am also pretty no-nonsense about them. I wait until my knees start to ache a bit and then replace the shoes with the exact same model or perhaps the upgraded version if the old one is no longer available. Repeat. I buy 3-4 pairs of running shoes a year depending on my mileage, and at nearly $100 a pop, I suppose I’m fulfilling my shoe quota that way.

I’m not sure what the point of this post is, mostly I’m wondering if I am the only non-shoe girl out there. Am I? If you do have a love affair with shoes, can you tell me why? I am clearly missing something. Oh, I almost forgot about purses, I cannot even be bothered to carry one. My wallet fits fine in my jacket pocket, as does my cell phone and the lip gloss I carry. I do love my current diaper bag though (the Kecci Shanghai Mommy bag), and often get comments about how pretty it is in Azalea (which doesn’t seem to be available anymore). Perhaps that is the hook; a few comments about a diaper bag might just lead me to a purse habit down the road. I guess only time will tell.

An Ode to my Treadmill

2007-03-15T14:31:00.000-06:00

You occupy a small portion of the basement family room, your humble little spot right in front of the never used wood burning fireplace. You consume 15 amps of current when operational, but never seem to blow the fuse. You have nice little nooks for storing television remotes, and random things like Kleenex and cell phones. You have a nice bar to hang a towel from, and a nice display that tells me how close I am to completing each ¼ mile lap. You can wirelessly read Polar heart rate monitor strap signals, though I confess to not using one in years. You have a nice soft but sturdy belt to absorb my foot strikes. Okay, truthfully I’m really struggling to come up with more compliments for you. The best thing about you is that you allow me to stay in decent running shape throughout the long cold winter. I can rely on you to be there no matter what the weather is like. I trust that I can step onto you and have basically the same experience every single time. Sure I play around with speed and incline to spice things up, but you and me, and the fan placed strategically behind us are the key ingredients. Thank you for being there for me.

You deserve the credit for my two awesome outdoor runs this week. The hilly mile of Tuesday’s run (a mile that is almost entirely uphill) was done in just 10:08, and my quads weren’t even screaming. The last time I’d run that route was in December and that mile was much closer to 12:00 back then. Some non-runners won’t understand the significance of just two measly minutes, but we know what that means. It means all of those Thursday speedwork sessions, where you happily increased my pace for 400 meter or 800 meter intervals had a great impact. I was used to losing speed in the spring, when I first ventured outdoors again, but not this year. This year, I decided to increase my mileage indoors, and incorporate speedwork to allay boredom, and it worked. I am not completely done with you for the season; your convenience still keeps you on my list of running options. However we won’t be spending nearly as much time together. I know you will be there for me on rainy days, and on sweltering hot days, and just days when I can’t fit in a run in the daylight.

Just remember that as I am running outdoors you have some duties to fulfill. You need to keep the recumbent bike company; he is certainly very lonely since nobody uses him with any regularity. Perhaps you can give the free weights and bench a pep talk, because eventually they will find their way back into my favor. Soon enough there will be a new room for you in the basement, an exercise room all for you. Oh, it doesn’t have anywhere near the ambiance of the family room, nor the nice natural lighting that comes in from the walk-out side of the house. It will, however, keep you from having little children climb all over you in ways that were never intended. You will also have your own dedicated 20 amp circuit to protect you from the possibility of blowing fuses. It is for your own protection you see. Never let anyone tell you that you have been hidden away so we had room in the basement for more practical things. You, my friend, are the most practical thing in the basement.

Real Moms get sat upon

2007-03-13T10:31:00.000-06:00

I was actually going to post something about the fact that I actually ran outdoors yesterday for the first time since Christmas Day, but since Meena tagged me I’ll play along. Really that was about the extent of my running post anyway, well I might have mentioned the fact that I had to wade through some pretty deep and nasty looking puddles along the way, and came home with mud caked on my calves, but aside from that I would have been done. I think. Oh except I would have had to start by saying that I started my run on the treadmill, got about 1.5 miles into it, and decided I was insane for wasting a 60 degree early March day by running on the treadmill. I knew there would be puddles you see, and I was right, but it was still worth it.

Okay, onto the Real Moms challenge. This is a little tricky since a photo is required. I had to pick from one of the many (you know all 5 of them) photos of me that are loaded into my Photobucket account. It seems there is a theme though, as more than one of the photos was of me with two children sitting on me in some manner or another. So I guess my entry will have to be this:

Real Moms. Making pretty darn good furniture of themselves.

So since I was tagged by Meena (who was tagged by FairlyOddMother), I am tagging Jennifer, Kate, Dineen, and Nancy (is it totally unfair to tag someone who’s blog you read, but highly doubt they even know about your own?). I’m going to say that 4 is the new 5 and call it even.

The "how to": write a post "Real Moms [insert what you do here]", followed by an explanation, a picture, and a "Real Moms. Making ....". Then tag five people.

And somebody else put it much better than I could have

2007-03-10T19:46:00.000-06:00

I've been thinking for a while about how destructive it is for Moms to beat each other up over petty little things. I can't count how many "debates" I've read on message boards over the years, that were little more than one group of Moms trying to justify their choices at the expense of another group of Moms choices. Surely, I am better Mom than someone else who fed her babies rat poison (formula), and better for not letting my children CIO right? Well, perhaps if I can find another group of Moms who made the same choices I did, then we can gang up on another group to make sure we are right! There is a small caveat though because my kids did have formula, but shhh don't tell the other Moms that. I felt guilty about it so that should count for something right?

I've been trying to come up with a blog post to address this issue for quite some time, but just couldn't do it without fumbling over myself in the process. Whenever this happens I usually find that someone else has already put it much better than I could have. Without further ado: Good Vs. Bad Mothering, from Sabrina Porterfield.

Some personal growth

2007-03-08T11:04:00.000-06:00

It seems to me that when you have to struggle to find the right words for a blog post that perhaps you should just give up and wait until something feels more natural. It is just a blog after all; I have no deadlines to complete an entry here. However I do sometimes get caught up in a cycle where I feel like I need to post something in order to keep my readers interested. A new person commenting on the blog is often a spur for me to write more. It is crazy of course, normally I don’t really care if people comment or not (at least that is what I tell myself when posts get no comments). It makes just as much sense as getting all excited when a complete stranger tells me that The Girl is absolutely beautiful, or that she could model does. Why is it that comments from complete strangers mean more to me, than comments from people close to me do? I seem to have an uncanny ability to deny compliments from my inner circle, to assume they are “just being nice.” A comment from a relative stranger means more to me because I don’t feel like they have to “just be nice.” It is crazy, but there it is; a window into my neurosis.

I have decided that this cracked behavior has to stop. From now on I am going to accept all compliments as they were intended, with no second guessing or negative self-talk thrown in for good measure. I started my blog as a way to document some of my thoughts; not to attract hordes of readers. I have to stop myself from logging into my web stats tracking account more than once a week. I’m only tracking for my own entertainment purposes anyway. It is funny that my post about the Backyardigans and another rant about Johnny and the Sprites seem to garner the most attention. The posts that are the least about me, find the greatest audience. I’m not sure what that says, and I don’t really care. I’ll keep writing things I want to write, and let the other bloggers cover the important topics of this world. This is my reality, and I’ll make it what I want it to be. I know that occasionally someone will read here and think what I said was true, or witty, or interesting in some regard, and that my friends is just gravy!

Thanks for reading, I'll keep treadmilling around but don't expect any fancy
Choreographed dance moves around here. I just run on my treadmill, boring as I am.

They should be in pictures

2007-03-08T09:09:00.000-06:00

I realize that I haven't shared many pictures of my children on this blog. In the beginning that was mainly because I figured most of my readers knew me from the message boards I frequented, and saw enough of my kids in signature pictures. There was also a bit of laziness at play. Anyway these are my favorite recent pictures of the kids:

The Boy looking thoughtfully at the snow

The Girl begging me to help her fix her mittens

I swear sometimes I just have to look at their pictures and my heart feels like it might explode with love. This motherhood thing is amazing.

Divide and Conquer

2007-03-06T11:05:00.000-06:00

Monday evenings can be somewhat tricky in our house. The Boy is generally a little more tired than normal after playing all day with his daycare buddies, and he often takes out his frustrations on the rest of us. After about the 10th whine of “but she is taking it,” or “but she isn’t playing it right” directed to us about The Girl we decided it was time to intervene. I offered to bring one of The Boy’s basement toys up to his bedroom while we kept The Girl downstairs with us. He excitedly agreed to this arrangement, went upstairs, and played happily until nearly bed time. DH later commented that this must be known as the “divide and conquer” parenting technique. It is definitely a technique we will keep up our sleeves to use again. It is amazing how much of parenting is just done by trial and error, and how strongly we cling onto the things that actually work.